Hero's Charge
by AvyQuinn
Summary: When she was around Snow she felt exposed. It was almost like he ripped off the bandages that held her together; that made her strong. She decided early on it was better that she hate him; anything to keep him away. **Late game spoilers! Beware**
1. Chapter 1

Things had changed.

She had started to crack.

Fractures in her carefully crafted visage were beginning to betray her thoughts. Good thing she was alone. All alone except for him.

Letting her eyes linger over the sleeping form on the bed before her, she held her breath as she rested a hand gently on his forearm. The smell of antiseptic burned her nostrils as she inhaled, leaning over him, the back of her hand barely brushing over the stubble on his chin. Lifting her fingertip to trace over the soft blonde tuft of hair and down the bridge of his nose, she smiled openly at him. His fine features captured her attention and she dared to let her finger tip caress the outline of his lips, ever so slightly. They were dry and cracked, but full and plush, and she was overcome with an urge to feel them. Her skin prickled with excitement, and she leaned forward to touch her lips to his. Her eyes drooped lazily and finally closed as she held her lips against his, not breathing, her heart now pounding out of control against her chest.

A rough hand seized the back of her head holding it in place against a now twisted face, as the once yielding lips turned hard and cold. Her eyes fluttered open to see he'd turned into a monster, but not just any monster, it was the same one that plagued all her dreams of late; a cie'th.

* * *

She awoke with a start and jerked herself upwards. Her breath came in shallow gasps as she fought to regain her senses. Rubbing her eyes, she took stock of the breathing, fleshy bodies of her comrades. Fang's arm was outstretched towards Vanille who slept soundly. Sazh was leaned up against a tree, arms crossed, snoring quite deeply. The fluffy yellow wonder twittered in it's sleep on his shoulder. She wondered what it could have been dreaming about. Hope was situated by the fire, near to herself, and Snow wasn't far away. Snow never let Hope get away from him these days. All there, all safe and sound. She sighed heavily and laid back.

_ Only a dream..._

The camp was quiet. It had been hours since anyone had last tended the fire, and it smoldered defiantly. Things here were wild and untamed; dangerous and unpredictable. Here she felt foreign and unwelcome even though she had been touched by a fal'Cie of this world, and given a charge which only it knew the details of. Reaching a hand behind her head, her breathing returned to normal, and her mind started to wander through the contents of the dream. Her eyes widened as she remembered Snow, and her inappropriate actions. Groaning inwardly she ran a hand down her face berating herself for the dream her unconscious mind had felt the need to torture her with. Instead of betraying her sister's trust, she'd just rather give up dreaming. Hell, she'd rather dream about cie'ths for the rest of her life if it would keep her from dreaming about _him_ ever again. She knew he was there, she'd seen him moments ago, but she didn't dare look at him twice. She wasn't sure how much more of this she could take.

It had been insufferably hot that day, and the evening brought no relief. They seemed to be in a very humid area of Gran Pulse, and it made for uncomfortable nights. She was no stranger to sweat, but sweating without actually doing anything was annoying. The cut of her clothes were already form fitting, but the constant second skin of sticky sweat made them cling to her all the more. Maybe a quick dip at the pond near the waterfall they had passed on the way to camp would do her mind and body some good. Quietly she grabbed her pack and set off back down the moss covered trail. While she trudged down the path, her thoughts strayed back to the dream. Overlooking the indiscretion on her part, she had witnessed Snow turning into a Cie'th before her eyes. She didn't want to admit the obvious meaning of the dream, but did her subconscious have to be so bloody blatant?

So uncertain were the days ahead that no one even knew what to say anymore. Oerba was their last chance. No one knew what would await them there, if anything. They all seemed to be careening towards a crossroads so that one destiny, or another, would be fulfilled. It would be great if they could escape their fates and somehow dismiss their brands, but if they couldn't and they failed their focus, they'd turn into monsters. If they fulfilled their focus, would they turn into crystal only to open their eyes again to a world they wouldn't recognize like Fang and Vanille had?

She wished she could say that was the first dream she had about one of her comrades turning into a monster. It wasn't. Each time a nightmare had worked it's way into her slumber she had awoken with a start, and checked the camp to make sure everyone remained flesh and blood. The closer they got to wherever it was they were going, the dreams became more frequent and more lucid. She had felt what she felt, and did what she had done in the dream because it had been just that, a dream.

She heard the gentle trickle of the falls ahead. Pushing the thoughts to the back of her mind, she descended down the flat planes of rock to the water's edge. A variety of tropical looking trees and flowers surrounded the pool, obscuring the waterfall that flowed life into headed towards that direction. Lightning was certain that everyone at camp was still asleep; she had been as quiet as possible when she gathered her things, but she couldn't take the risk of bathing out in the open. She'd never live it down if someone were to see her.

As she approached the falls the scene became a bit foggy, but as the cool spray infused the air around her it felt good on her hot skin. She hung her pack and sword case on a near by branch and sat down to undo her boots. Making quick work of the buckles, she pulled them off and placed them neatly to the side. As she peeled off each piece of clothing, she breathed a sigh of relief. Her movements were quick, but she grew impatient with the complicated pieces of clothing. She unzipped her knit top, stopping when she exposed the mark of the l'Cie on her chest. She stared at it for a moment, wondering how much time she had left before she would be at it's mercy. How soon would she meet with destiny?

She pressed the flats of her fingers to her lips as Snow's face regained its position in the forefront of her mind. She recalled how warm his lips had been. How they felt dry and cracked beneath hers, but how altogether marvelous. Muttering, she vigorously shook her head as if to physically expel the memory from her flustered brain. Shrugging the top off her shoulders, it fell softly on the smooth rock. Her no nonsense black bra quickly followed. Hooking her fingers under the waist band of her skirt, she slid it down around her hips and onto the ground, stepping out of it. Reaching towards her pack, she picked out small towel and tossed it aside. From the side pocket she pulled out a few bobby pins to secure her hair in a mess onto the top of her head.

She was ready. Her foot went in first. She sighed happily; the water was nice and cool. Wading in a bit farther, it felt good as it swirled around her thighs, washing the sticky sweat away. Under foot, the pool was lined with the same smooth rock as the path she arrived on. Leaning forward with her arms out, and bending at the knee, she pushed off into the water, keeping her head above. Slowly making her way into the middle of the pool with smooth steady strokes, she basked in the feeling of the water against her naked tested the depth, touching the bottom comfortably with the ball of her foot. It wasn't as deep as she thought it to be. Standing, water barely covering her breasts, she raised her hands to her face and patted it down. Again, as her fingers came into contact with her lips, his face came back to haunt her, but instead of shaking him away this time, she closed her eyes to see him more clearly.

When she first met him, she wondered what Serah saw in him. She thought him to be some big oaf who was all talk and no action. _Snow Villiers. What kind of name is that anyway?_She'd hated him. Lately though, her opinion of him was changing. No longer did she wonder what her sister saw in him. She wondered if Serah had seen Snow pushed to the limit as they all were now. He was brave, surely, and kind; always doing for others and expecting nothing in return. Physically he was an impressive sight; tall; strapping and well put together with a tight chest and a well proportioned body. It had been hard to keep her eyes off him when she had to bandage him up at the Estheim's. Lingering gazes lead to guilt-ridden ones when she caught herself thinking something inappropriate about her future brother-in-law. Suffice it to say, the idea of her recent dream had not been completely foreign to her, nor as repugnant as it should have been. He was very disarming with his boyish charm, mop of blonde hair and sweet demeanor, and that's exactly why she kept her distance.

He made her _feel _again; and she didn't like it.

She had decided to live the life of a soldier after her parents had died. Serah needed her protection more than ever since they'd gone. By adopting a new name she hoped to say good-bye to her painful past. In fact, she wanted to say good-bye to emotions in general. Emotions didn't do a soldier any good, they served only to make one weak. When she was around Snow, though, she felt exposed. It was almost like he ripped off the bandages that held her together; that made her strong. She decided early on it was better that she hate him; anything to keep him away.

With an exasperated sigh, she splashed her face with more cool water then waded back to land. Stretching her arms out in front of her, she breathed slowly now, willing the juvenile pitter-patter of her heart to stop. Even the thought of his good nature browbeat her cold determination to the point of ruin. So, with him, she may as well be as naked as she was now. She braced herself on her elbows and arched her back, offering herself up to the night air and the indifferent gaze of the moon. There was no one here to interrupt her thoughts, at least until the sun rose again.

The sound of rustling met her ear and she froze. Something was in the trees directly behind her. Her sword was too far away and she was naked. She'd take her chances in the water, at least until she could assess the situation. She caught a rough edge on the stone with her foot and pitched herself into the water ahead. Splashing as she regained her footing, she looked around alertly and called out to the darkness of the trees now in her full view.

"Who's there?" she said simply, her voice unwavering. "Show yourself!"

A few seconds went by, and some more rustling. A cloud drifted across the face of the moon, darkening her field of vision. She squinted towards the noise and strained to hear what more she could. Her heart beat hard but steady, adrenaline sharpening her senses. She wondered what manner of beast was creeping around in those trees.


	2. Chapter 2

"I said show yourself!"

"Ok, ok! Don't shoot, it's just me." The familiar timbre of his voice was unmistakable. She was glad for the sudden cloud cover. Certainly he didn't notice her blush."Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you. I woke up, and noticed you weren't in camp..." He was fully in the clearing now, brushing himself off. His blond hair seemed a beacon even in the darkness.

_ Villiers._ _Figures._ She scowled and turned her back to him. Her skin prickled as the water around her felt noticeably warmer. _Maybe if I ignore him he'll go away._..

He couldn't make out her form very well without the moon's light, but she was near the middle of the small pool, her hair gathered on her head. It was different than how he'd ever seen her before. It almost made her look ladylike. He grinned. "Came for a midnight swim, huh?" He continued cheerfully, sitting to take his boots off. "You want some company?"

Her heart leapt in her throat.

_ No!_

She parted her lips to refuse his offer of company, but no words came. Trying to steady her breathing, she turned back to where he stood, sinking down in the water until it covered her bare shoulders. The cloud cover had cleared and the moonlight seemed to be brighter than before. He had taken his boots off and they lay sprawled out where he had carelessly tossed them. As he disrobed, she stared at him. The cool light played on his moist skin as the muscles in his arms worked effortlessly at his pants and she found herself unable to blink. He hadn't seen her staring. She shivered and turned back around before he could notice the stolen glances.

_ Eh, you're pathetic for looking at him like that. It's just Snow. Y'know, the big dummy. The one that infuriates you._

She quickly waded towards another section of the basin, trying to escape his inescapable company. But she knew it was impossible; he'd be there soon enough. She closed her eyes to the heavy spray that showered her face and the crashing of water in her ears. Standing easily on the balls of her feet, she stretched her arms out in front of her, exhaling therapeutically. Mentally she was a mess, but she was the one in of the group that needed to stay together. Putting emotions on the back burner and exacting the face of a cool and collected leader had made her nerves raw and the her temper short. Snow Villiers also made her temper short.

"Hey, are you ok?" A heavy hand weighed on her shoulder, but the touch surprised her and she slapped the hand roughly away. She spun around to see Snow standing behind her, rubbing his wrist, his nose wrinkled in discomfort. "Ow..."

"I'm fine!" she snapped harshly, almost instantly regretting her biting tone. Her features never softened, though. Weakness wasn't something she wanted show, but when her eyes met his, he looked defeated.

He wondered what he had done to make her hate him so, other than the obvious reasons; the same reasons why he hated himself. He thought that they had been making some sort of progress being in such close quarters. The bruise he'd sport tomorrow would be his proof he was wrong.

A hint of softness crept into her words this time around. "Don't be so concerned with me. I'm fine." She broke the eye contact, suddenly acutely aware of the proximity between them.

He hadn't noticed she was topless. Gazing at the smooth lines of her shoulders and neck, his mouth went dry. He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, the air around them suddenly tense. Diverting his eyes, he looked skyward. The canopy of trees above them concealed all but a little bit of the stars above. Lightning seemed thankful his gaze no longer fell upon her exposed flesh, but she turned around so she didn't have to look at him. She could barely be this close to him and keep her wits about her.

"Do you think she can see us down here, Lightning?" His tone was meaningful.

Lightning shook her head absently.

_ Serah._

She hoped not. She wouldn't want her little sister to see her standing here. Not in the state she was in, much less with her fiancee. The way Snow made her feel was shameful. She didn't want to feel the way she did when she was around him. If all this hadn't happened and they weren't standing there now, a breath apart from each other, then would she still feel the same way for him? Would she still have developed this improper infatuation if he hadn't grown to be more to her than just an annoyance?

"I... don't know." When she finally spoke aloud, she wasn't sure to what question her response was directed at.

Another silence. Snow spoke again, but this time his voice was softer and seemed closer to her ear. Her heartbeat surged. Surely he was closer to her now, but he wasn't touching her. She thought that she may burn up if she had to feel his big mitt on her skin again.

"Are you scared?"

She couldn't deny she had fears about this journey. Fears about what awaited them at the end. Were they to become walking corpses with nothing but regret and anguish to fill their days? Would they remember what it was like to have been human when they turned into Cie'ths? Would she remember her life with regret for actions that had led her thus, or maybe she'd earmark the missed opportunities.

_ I had to be strong for Serah..._

The words came back to her now as she had recounted her story to Hope. She had given up so much of her youth; she hadn't been on dates, or even been kissed. On her inevitable path she would never have a chance to give herself wholly to anyone, or have anyone give themselves to her. No more birthdays or holidays; she'd never have a family; she'd never again wish on fireworks, or grow old and die. In the end, her fate would be similar whether she carried out her focus or not. Walking dead or encased in a crystal slumber, never to know when she may awake from it, if at all. She'd considered and reconsidered things so many times, but she couldn't see a happy resolution. She wasn't just scared, she was terrified.

"Yes."

The rush of water washed away her answer, but her body trembled, betraying all that she had painstakingly hidden. Hidden, most of all, from Snow. She felt shame, anger, fear, hopelessness and her mortal fragility all at once, and it threatened to split her soul in twain. It was too much to bear, and her body overflowed with unchecked emotion.

Snow didn't hear her reply, but saw it. She was visibly shaking, and he knew she'd hate him but he wrapped her in his arms. She thrashed violently, and though he held her arms at her sides, he was barely able to contain her. Even if she didn't know it, she needed someone beside her and he chose himself to be that someone. Not long after they'd witnessed Serah's transformation he decided that she was safe enough for the time being, and he shouldn't be so self-centered as to constantly pine for her. After all, he kept her memento forever next to his heart. He then employed his energies to help support the rest of the people struggling along with him. It wasn't just him who was hurting.

Serah's fate was sealed for now. It may not have been fair, but it was what happened in spite of their attempts so far. He couldn't save Serah. He failed her but, damn it, he would not fail Lightning.

The hair piled on her head started to fall free from it's bonds as she writhed against him, but still he held fast. He closed his eyes against her struggle, not saying a word. He would hold her until she stopped and regained control, or if she did not, he would be there when she broke. He would be there for her always, no matter what.

The thrashing stopped, the fight finally drained from her. He felt her knees give way, and turned her towards him, drawing her into his chest. His arms cradled her frame, a hand in her hair. Silence weighed on the air for a long moment, then her body drew a ragged breath as she started to quake anew. Silent sobs rattled through her and he could feel hot tears spill down his chest. He smoothed her hair, inhaling her scent, chin resting on the top of her head.

He remained silent; nothing need be said.

She was crying. Why was she being so pathetic, so weak, so disgraceful? Was this what happened when people snapped? Was this what she really was without her cool facade to hold her together? Tears streamed down her face. Why did she have to show weakness now, of all times? And why, when she thought about losing everything in fulfilling her destiny, did Snow's face appear before her? Why was Serah taken from her? Why hadn't she believed in her? Why couldn't she hate him? Why did these worlds wait for ruin from some obscure focus? And most of all, why had these good people been drawn into a fight that wasn't theirs? She had so many questions, and no answers.

All she knew now was that she and Snow were together in this moment, and that it may very well be the last private moment they'd have before the end. She had to make the best of it, and not be overrun again by the fear and uncertainty that threatened to rip her apart. She needed to regain control and not waste the precious little time left.

As her intense release of emotion leveled off, he again became aware that she was, at least partially nude beneath his hands. Her skin felt softer than he would have guessed. Looking down at her, he carefully brushed aside the blush kissed hair from her forehead. Gently he pressed his warm cheek against her crown, holding her closer. With her arms still at her sides, he could feel the curve of her breasts against him. He tried not to think about her heat between his arms, lest his body betray him. Trailing a finger from her jaw to under her chin, he tilted her face to look at him. From behind teary eyes her could see her listless expression. Snow was no one if he had no one to protect. All he wanted was to have the strength to protect the people he loved. The woman in his arms was no exception, even if she threatened to take him down with her. The frown on her lips made his heart ache and he couldn't help himself anymore. Something came over him as he carelessly bent his head to kiss that frown.

Lightning's eyes widened as his mouth descended on hers, and she closed her eyes, waiting for the moment their lips touched. Blood screamed through her veins; and every inch of her body ached. His touch set her desperate skin on fire and in that moment she could feel everything; the cool water that lapped at her skin; his large hand on the small of her back; her breasts pressed against his taut chest; and the finger that tilted her chin up to his face. The loneliness that overshadowed her lightened at the prospect that he might feel as she did.

But at the last second, he passed by her mouth and pressed his cheek against hers, hugging her.

While in this awkward embrace she felt so childish and stupid. He couldn't have possibly felt the same about her as she did about him. He was in love with Serah, but... he was going to kiss her, wasn't he? Did she imagine all that?

He loved the feel of her body pressed against his, but he couldn't let himself do this to her. She was vulnerable and he wasn't going to take advantage of her. She would have never been in this situation with him if she had been of sound mind. He wanted her to come to him when she wanted; IF she wanted. He knew how she felt about him; she'd made it abundantly clear that she thought of him as a nuisance. Someone who was all talk, and no action. A bum with no job and no prospects who wanted to marry her precious little sister. But no matter how she treated him, he'd still look out for her. So, he'd come out here looking for her to make sure she was alright. It was all innocent enough, but things escalated. His villainous intent had tried to steal a kiss from her, and even though he almost felt that she desired it too, it was impossible to know for sure. A hero wouldn't take something that wasn't his to take. And a hero's heart would stay true, he reminded himself. He brought his attention back to Lightning.

"You ok now?" he pulled away to look into her eyes, withdrawing his arms and submerging them awkwardly beside him. He took a small step back and let the cool water create an all too insubstantial barrier.

She averted her eyes, feeling the sting of embarrassment. "Yeah."

"Hey, look at me at least." He smiled slightly to warm the mood, and again he lifted her chin with his finger. Their eyes met. She could feel the conflicting emotions that swirled within her, but she hoped she might be able to at least conceal the more primal ones.


	3. Chapter 3

She could tell from the look on his face that he had been confused by what he saw in her eyes. She'd gladly take confusion over recognition. As if magnetically charged, he approached her again, closing the distance without realizing. He cupped her cheek. Breaking the earnest contact, she leaned into his palm. What was it that he saw in her eyes? It was unrecognizable and unidentifiable to him, but it was genuine whatever it was.

She mouthed his name, wondering who might hear if she dared speak it aloud.

_Snow... _

His breath hitched in his throat.

He was in a daze as she brought her hand up to caress his rough cheek. Sliding it under his jaw, she guided his head towards hers. He could hardly believe this was happening. Was she going to kiss him? His stomach flip flopped in anticipation when he began his descent at her insistence.

"... there's something I need to do before I can't..." she whispered.

Her warm breath tickled his mouth. She met his bewildered gaze and held it.

Lifting herself up on her tip toes, she touched her lips to his. He did not reciprocate the slightly awkward gesture. His face was stunned at first, eyes wide and unblinking. In fact, he wasn't even sure who this woman was that stood before him; the one he thought stood here initially would surely rather punch him in the mouth than bestow a kiss upon it.

The unreturned kiss lasted only seconds before she broke away. Her hands dropped unceremoniously to her sides with a splash. His lips tingled as he stood there gawking at the fine pink tint on her cheeks. _She just _kissed_ me...?_ He snuck his tongue out to lick his vacant lips. They held the slightest bit of sweetness from the caress.

_Guess I can go back to hating him._ Lightning accepted bitterly.

Snow watched her head sink, a sort of confused compassion creasing his brow.

"_That's_ what you needed to do?" He blurted obtusely.

She snorted still not looking up, her embarrassment obvious.

_Ah, hell._

He quickly explained himself. "Sorry, I... uh... I meant that I didn't expect you to do that." he swallowed stiffly. This whole scenario seemed like a bizarre dream. In his dreams though, he was usually a bit more suave. That, and she hadn't pummeled him yet. He took a deep breath. She refused to look up.

"Let me try that again..." His tone had a provocative edge.

He made short work of threading a hand through her hair and bringing her face to meet his in a deliciously wanton kiss. He wrapped an arm tightly around her waist, once again pressing their bodies together. Her arms encircled his torso, hands kneading the firm muscles in his back. The kiss was heady and lightheadedness loomed. He opened his mouth slightly and she mirrored his movements, awkwardly parting her lips against his. A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth, and confidently, he brushed the tip of his tongue over hers. This felt so natural; like they'd done it before. She tasted so damn good; so different from Serah.

_Serah..._

Keeping his eyes closed, Snow broke the kiss and pressed his forehead against Lightning's. She leaned farther into him trying to maintain the connection, but when he denied it, a throaty growl escaped her. He heaved a shaky sigh, and mentally checked what faculties he was still in control of. Apparently he wanted this more than he knew; his body reacted strongly to the enthusiasm of the kiss and the sound of Lightning's need. He had a feeling he was about to get in over his head. At the end of the day, what price would he pay for betraying Serah? As for Lightning, he wasn't sure if he would be able to handle the raw nerve she'd become. Emotions were running high and they clouded his head. He snatched her wrists in his hands, prying her arms from around his body.

"I... should go." Was all he said.

Astonished, she watched as he pulled away from her. As he started towards the dry slabs of rock she held out her hand to him, wanting his warmth back against her. He got farther away from her and still she stood. Being apart from him made it hard to breathe. She willed her feet to move through the water, her hand still reaching. It felt as though she were in a nightmare unable to move under her own control. Her voice was hoarse when she opened her mouth to speak. It was no more than a whisper that got lost in the mist.

"Wait..."

Tears threatened to spill from her eyes, and she began to push herself clumsily through the water with her hands. She managed to swallow and found her voice.

"Don't go."

It was faint, but he'd heard her. Those words echoed in his head, but his feet worked relentlessly against him through the water. He hated hearing the emotional chord in her voice, but one of them had to leave. He sorely wanted to turn back and take her up in his embrace again. He wanted to kiss away those tears he knew had welled up in her eyes because of him. But how could he?

She couldn't let him walk away; but maybe she should. Would it be easier? Less complex, certainly, but easier? Would she regret letting him walk away from her with all that was unsaid and undone now between them? Maybe_ she_ should have been the one walking away.

A cool realization washed over her. It was now or never. _Damn you, Villiers. _Ceasing her chase and clenching her fists, the cry of his name shattered the stillness of the night.

"Snow!"

He stopped in his tracks. His name on her tongue made him feel weak. This was a problem. More than that, he decided, this was the point of no return. This was where they became something more, or forgot the whole thing ever happened. It could be no other way.

Her body ached, and he begged to respond in kind.

He placed his hand over his heart. _Forgive me._

When he turned back to her, his gaze fell on her slender physique. Droplets of water glinted on her skin under the light of the moon. She must have felt embarrassed to let him gaze upon her so freely. She crossed her arms over her chest, attempting to retain some modesty. He felt an unadulterated smile cross his lips, watching her entirely out of her element. He had not had a favourable first impression of her, but that had all changed when they got swept away in this mess. How peculiar it would look to anyone if they were to see them now.

She was enchanting, standing there before him; much like he imagined a Valkyrie of Asgard might look if one were to ever grace his presence. She held her head high now, her gaze firm in spite of herself. He approached her slowly, waiting for the fantasy to dissipate into the mists.

His gaze never left hers as he reached out to take her wrists again. This time his touch was soft and deliberate as he drew her arms out to the side and away from her body. He didn't want her to question his intent. He would never hurt her or do anything that she didn't want, but her arms moved easily and without hesitation. She never looked away from his face as he ran his tempered hands down her silky skin to cup her elbows. He craned his neck and caressed her collarbone with the tip of his nose. She made no sound but tipped her head back languidly. She arched against him, and he closed upon her hip pulling her into him. His eyes were courteous as he regarded her state of undress. Slowly lowering her other arm into the water his fingers discovered the blackened brand of the l'Cie between her breasts.

A whisper of a moan escaped her throat as she savoured his intimate touch.

That was it.

His body tensed for a second as his resolve finally collapsed. He may have claimed the title of Hero, but he was mere flesh and blood. He took her head in his hand and crushed his lips on hers again. She tingled with excitement as she pushed off his bandana and tangled her fingers in his hair. She tugged on it when his tongue seduced her lips apart. They moaned against one another, breaths ragged as they captured each other's swollen lips in a vigorous display of want.

If felt good to let go. Her senses were filled with him. Even though she hated losing control, she realized that she trusted no other like she trusted him. He had blamed himself for things that were beyond his control. She felt the guilt that he endured everyday since this all began. She knew that it wasn't his fault, but she had blown up at him all the same. She needed someone to blame, and he was there. He was always there.

Now there was no blame or resentment. There was only an overwhelming need to get closer. Everything that wasn't him or her melted away as they gave into each other. His hand brushed her hair off her shoulder, and he devoured her neck. Feeling him shoulder her weight she grappled onto him; again her actions were clumsy. She was kissing his shoulders and his neck, her warm tongue darting out to explore him. A shudder came undisguised but he steeled himself against the more intense of his testosterone driven urges. He'd not go forward until she wanted him to, as damn near impossible as that seemed. Her pace encouraged him to the brink of sweet delirium where he was doomed to come undone, but he fought to retain a shard of his sanity. He'd not have the villain in him take over.

Hooking her leg around his waist, he relished at how urgently she held onto him. His hand clutched her satiny thigh, his other sprawled against her lower back. He dipped her slightly backward so that he got the best angle of her pulse. He found it arousing to bear witness to her unrestrained actions. He winced slightly against the milky skin of her neck as she dug her fingertips into his flesh. All of this was quickly working to a fevered pitch, but worry troubled him.

Something was wrong.

"Lightning. St...op" Her assault on him continued even after he spoke her name. "Ahh..." he hissed, pressing his lips against her neck. He grazed her collarbone with his teeth.

A rustling in the trees made him turn his head away. There was definitely something wrong.

Unhooking her leg, he stood protectively in front of her, turning towards the sound.

When he released her, her mind was foggy with desire and she was unsteady on her feet. His back was to her. _What's happening?_ She felt herself waiver atop weakened knees and instantly his strong arms steadied her. "There's something out there" he said in a low tone. They faced the trees where he'd emerged earlier.

Her ears perked up. She splashed her face with a bit of water to hasten mental clarity.

"I'll go check it out." he said looking down into her face, smiling gently. "Stay here."

"Fat chance." She pushed her way around him and headed for the shore.

He chuckled lightly, and waded after her, finding his bandana and wringing it out. He noticed the sway of her hips and the dimples in her back. He had guessed she was the no nonsense type. Black looked brilliant on her.

"Whew" he sighed audibly, resituating the bandana.

The heavy fabric shorts he always wore under his pants weighed him down in the water. She had a wide head start, and he was thankful. The cool water on his pelvis and the slight edge of the danger served as a sort of cold shower.

Rushing to her clothes, she threw on her overcoat and buckled it closed. Grabbing her gun-blade she closed her eyes and stood as a statue, listening intently. She heard a twig snap from across the way near the path. She flipped open her eyes and saw that Snow was trudging out of the water. "MOVE!" She ordered. A ferocious Pulsian wildcat, fangs bared and claws extended, lunged out of the trees and barreled into Snow.

"Wha-" The next thing he knew, he breathless and on his back. The good size wildcat stood on his chest, pinning him and swatted at his face. Just in time, he covered his head with his forearms, and the huge paw raked across them. Sharp claws tore the flesh on his arm and he winced, feeling the trickle of drawn blood. He'd not been paying attention when he'd been tackled. As penance the flavour of his own metallic blood was on his lips, which had not so long ago known another forbidden sensation. Taking advantage of the second of respite, Snow threw a punch at the menacing face and connected with authority, dazing it.

Lightning took careful aim with her weapon and fired. The gunshot echoed through the forest; the bullet successfully meeting it's target between the eyes. It collapsed lifelessly on top of Snow, keeping him against the ground.

"Whoa. Thanks." He took a second to steady his breathing.

With herculean effort, he pushed the beast off of himself and got to his feet. _That could have been messy._ He shuddered slightly, feeling a bit too human. A layer of dirt clung to him, and his forearm stung. He looked down to assess the wound. Not too deep, but lots of blood. Three gashes of ripped flesh marred his brand. Looking back in Lightning's direction, he noted she was already completely dressed. _Shame, that..._

"I'm going back to camp. It'll be dawn soon." Lightning had already started up the path back, her voice was stiff.

"Yeah! You go on ahead. I'll... catch up with you." He sighed watching her jump lightly from stone to stone. _Always with the pushing away._ As his heart sank, he mocked himself. _Was it something I did?_ He pulled his bandana off and ran a hand through his hair.

"Hey Lightning!"

She stopped, but didn't turn around.

"Listen. I'm really so-" he started.

"Don't." She said coolly and resumed her course.

She didn't want to hear him apologize for anything that happened. He had nothing to apologize for. She was the one that didn't know how to deal with the tumultuous emotions inside, so she put the wall back up and walked away. She was glad for the opportunity to stand on more familiar footing and safeguard _him_, for a change. It managed to dull some of the sting from the embarrassing scene in the water. It was all about saving face, but was she embarrassed about what had transpired, or was she just ashamed? She wasn't sure of anything anymore. She flushed at the thought of her naked skin all over his, her hands knotted in his hair, their bodies entwined. It felt so good but at the same time, her heart ached with guilt.

She looked up at the quickly lightening sky; at Cocoon.

Snow was back in the water, cleansing himself of the dirt and blood that stuck stubbornly to his damp skin. He wasn't at all sure what had happened. He'd never thought of Lightning in that manner. That was until recently. He held her in high regard, and as such, he'd kept his random masculine thoughts caged. She wasn't someone who should be the object of some illicit fantasy, either in his mind or anyone else's. Plenty of times he'd been in earshot of some unflattering comments about her. She was cold to everyone and so everyone judged her as such, but he'd taken up for her on more than one occasion.

One night he'd been sitting at the shack in Bodhum having a drink with friends. He'd overheard some bawdy drunkard loudly proclaiming that he'd teach that frigid Lightning Farron a thing or two. The drunks at his table had whooped and hollered as the man made lewd gestures with his hands. Snow was quick to anger and hauled the poor excuse for a man out of the establishment by the collar, ready to oblige _him_ with a lesson. She wasn't easy to get along with, that much he'd admit, but she didn't deserve to be referred to in such a manner. He found he had wanted to protect her, even then, and tender thoughts had crept up on him so silently he hadn't been aware when they had started to take over his heart.

Dawn was indeed coming. He raised his eyes to the sky; to Cocoon.


	4. Chapter 4

_A/N: Finally! The next chapter. Sorry for the delay, I decided to rework it a couple days ago, and I just got it back from the cleaners. I've noticed little errors in the other chapters that got through my editing process. Sorry! I hope it's not too distracting. Thanks for being awesome and overlooking that stuff and thanks for taking the time to review! Much appreciated!_

_

* * *

_

He'd only slept a couple hours until he'd gone to look for, and found, Lightning. _A very naked Lightning._ _What a night!_ He had honestly just wanted to go and make sure she was alright. She could handle herself but he was compelled to go and look for her anyway. If something had happened to her he wouldn't be able to forgive himself. Usually he slept like a rock so he didn't have an explanation as to why he was roused from slumber, but he had been restless that night. He'd been uneasy ever since they arrived on Pulse.

This slight insomnia was irritating; sleep was one thing he took great pleasure in, and if he was unable to sleep he might as well do something useful. He stood and yawned, scratching his belly under his shirt. Collecting the pot of water kept near the fire for washing, he placed it on the smouldering embers so at least it'd be warm in the morning. A quick hygiene boost always put everyone in a great mood, and it was much more pleasant to travel if everyone was in high spirits. Dusting off his hands he stood quietly in camp for a moment, looking over the sleeping faces of his comrades. He'd really do whatever he could to make their lives easier. Although, now there was a familiar face missing. _Lightning._ He glanced around again to double check and then around the perimeter of the camp. _Hmm, I wonder where she went._

Turning away from the fire, he had taken off down the path with his feet as guides. _I wonder if she came this way._ His footsteps were silent as he made his way to, well, wherever. After a few minutes of walking, he felt a familiar, slightly urgent sensation, he headed off the path and into the thick trees to relieve himself. There was something fun about urinating outside, as long as no one walked in on him. But then again this was Gran Pulse, not outside the Shack back on Bodhum, where civilization was somewhat lacking.

_Well, this is as good a place as any. _Unlike on the smooth path behind him, he was clumsy in the trees. Making a great lot of noise while navigating the tricky terrain of ancient roots and sunken ground, he finally stopped and looked around before unzipping his pants and getting down to business. Bracing himself on a tree with one hand and guiding with the other, he sighed contentedly as the urgency drained out of him.

"Who's there? Show yourself!" demanded a voice from beyond the trees.

His head perked up in the direction of the feminine tone.

_Lightning!_ He quickly finished up and started towards the sound, with careful footing._ I hope she doesn't shoot me._ He chuckled nervously at the thought. It was more than possible that she might; especially when she saw it was him. _What's she even doing out here at this time of night?_ Emerging from the trees into a clearing, he put his hands up in the air. "It's just me!" In retrospect, maybe he should have turned around right then and there, but for reasons unbeknownst to himself he just couldn't.

The preceding events had complicated things and as it was, he wasn't good with complications. After all, he was a pretty simple man. When he met Serah, all he wanted to do was protect her and give her everything. Her charms were irresistible; she was sweet and playful, beautiful and kind. He was so lucky to have found her. He did whatever she asked of him, happily, and without question. Their romantic love was so innocent and light-hearted; they hardly ever quarreled, and when they did they couldn't stay angry at each other for long.

Then she'd been branded by the Pulse fal'Cie uncovered at Bodhum. There'd been an unquantifiable tension between them; she'd been distant before she'd told him about being branded. She tried to push him away from her and they'd fought about it, but she wanted to handle her focus on her own and not let him get involved. He almost let her walk away from him, but he couldn't let her face something like that by herself. He proclaimed that he would protect her until he could no longer do so. He loved her, and always would.

With a flick of his boot he sent a pebble bouncing into a small pond beside their newly worn path. He reached in his pocket and pulled out Serah's tear. Still walking, he regarded the crystal in his hand, quieting his mind. He wasn't able to hear her voice in his head as clearly as before, but he had been preoccupied. The memento was cool against his palm, and it gave him a sense of direction; a reminder of why he was doing all the things he'd done since that day when he'd lost her. Raising the crystal to the light, he smiled at it. _I'll see you again, baby. Bet on it._ Gingerly sliding the crystal back into his pocket, his mind was thankfully a little less addled.

Even though there were physical similarities between the two, Serah lacked a certain intangible intensity. She wasn't a kid, she'd had boyfriends before, he was fairly sure. They hadn't done anything too heavy; she never invited it. Actually, if he was being honest, she didn't incite it in him, either. Thinking about Serah was warm and comfortable, like cuddling a cherished toy. He'd never been driven to do anything indecent with her, not that it bothered him. He was happy with how their relationship had been progressing.

Lightning was another story, though. Even now, just thinking about her made his pulse quicken. She was the most practical person he'd ever met. She'd always err on the side of caution and was always sheltering Serah from the harder lessons in life. Lightning had a temper, although, and often it set the people around her up for bodily harm. She was strong, beautiful, and confident. She was a born leader, like he was.

What had transpired last night was wild and instinctual. A raw need had threatened to engulf him, so much so it took all his will to not give into it. When her tears spilled down his chest he had wanted to comfort her, like he would have comforted any friend, but he found his heart strangled by the strange emotions flowing from her. He averted a most serious error in judgment when he'd bypassed her lips, but after _she_ kissed _him_, he found he'd become a slave to the way she tasted; the way she sounded; the way she felt and all in such a short period of time. She seemed to be the most addictive of drugs.

He rubbed the growth on his cheek. It had been so long since he'd shaved that the stubble was softening up. His hair was so light it barely looked like he had any beard at all. _I wonder what it feels like to her..._ She had put her hands on his face so comfortably, and he knew what it felt like to him, but did she like it too? Her touch shocked him into dopiness and everything moved past him in slow motion...

_Aww, give me a break!_ He sighed, clenching his fists, pulling himself back into reality. He wondered if she was destined to knot up his thoughts for the rest of his natural life. He needed a distraction from his silent torture.

He regarded the diverse group of adventures trudging the same path as he.

Hope and Lightning lead the group, as usual. She hadn't talked to him all day. In fact, not only did she not verbally acknowledge his presence, she didn't even look at him. As for Hope, he always stood a little too far into her bubble, but she never moved away. Sometimes she'd even put her arm around his shoulders or ruffle his hair. Walking evenly with her now, he'd look up to her admiringly, and when she'd catch him, he'd quickly look away. Even though she usually had little to say, she still smiled easily. They seemed to share a special sort of bond together, and he found himself smiling about it. She'd been hard on Hope, but he only came out better from the experience; he'd started toughening up. Sazh followed, walking with confident strides but keeping to himself, sometimes making conversation with the tiny chocobo that never strayed too far from him. Vanille and Fang talked easily with each other, Fang obviously very taken with her bubbly friend. He found their upbeat tones raised his spirits, but Lightning preferred to keep her distance from their happy conversations.

His eyes drifting nonchalantly from the figures of the two Pulsian women, they came to rest on Lightning. The sway of her hips were bound to land him in trouble again. Last night, the mere thought of them almost made him the main course for a Gorgonopsid, his arm ached and burned as the very physical reminder. But no matter how he may try, he found it impossible to look away from her for long. Her hair flowed in the slight breeze, the bright sunlight catching the unusual colour creating a halo around her head...

"Hey, Snow. What happened to your arm?" asked Fang, anchoring him to reality before he could drift away again.

"Hmm?" He brought his attention around to her voice, but he'd missed the question. The group had stopped walking and now eyes were on him. Vanille gasped, looking at the arm with the black bandana tied around it.

"Oh my gosh! Are you ok!?" she shrieked, running over to him, fingering the cloth until his arm was free of it. He winced a little as the crusted scabs attached to both his arm and the cloth were ripped off under Vanille's enthusiastic fingers.

"Oh! This? Yeah, it's nothing. You should see the other guy." he said easily. Tugging at his arm, she pushed his sleeve back over his elbow.

"When did this happen?" asked Vanille, pressing at the wound with her fingers, assessing it. "And why didn't you tell me earlier? I hope it's not infected..." she muttered as her hand started to glow, hovering it over the jagged gashes.

"I just had a run in with a big kitten last night. Nothing I couldn't handle." He winked at Vanille when she looked up at him. She grinned and continued with the incantation.

"Looks like you let that kitten get a little too close, eh Hero?" ribbed Sazh, grinning.

_You have no idea. _Snow smiled tightly.

"Last night...?" asked Fang, arching an eyebrow. Lightning had stopped as well, still in earshot of the conversation, Hope busily talking at her about something or other. Snow looked past his concerned companions to the pink haired woman. She threw him a sideways glance.

"Yeah," he started, wanting to make no mention of her in his recount "I was starting to stink, what with all this sweating and lack of proper hygiene. I went for a soak at the pond back down the path. I didn't want to offend the more feminine sensibilities among us with my manly fragrance." He held his nose as if to emphasize his point, then laughed lightly. This elicited chuckles from Sazh and Fang.

Vanille sniffed in his direction. "Well, you smell fine now!" She declared and stuffed the extra bandana back into his palm, letting his arm go. "There! All better!" The little medic then took her position beside Fang who nodded in approval ruffling her hair upon return.

"Much appreciated, Vanille." He smiled brightly at her as she nodded. Putting the bandana in his pocket, he looked back at Lightning. She stared where he'd pocketed the piece of cloth. He looked down at his mended arm, flexing it, watching the muscles ripple underneath the regenerated tissue. The skin was slightly inflamed where the gashes had been, but the ache was gone.

"The skin will be a little sensitive for a day or so, but then it'll be like it never happened!" insisted Vanille.

He held up his forearm and flashed his brand at her, smiling. And then the convoy was moving again.

* * *

He figured by the look on Lightning's face she hadn't notice him get pawed the other night. It seemed that she wanted to get away from him as quickly as possible. He didn't blame her, but things had changed. They insisted on opening a door; one that would be difficult and painful to close, if they were to close it at all. He knew that he didn't want to live without her in his life, but where did that leave him and Serah? Actually, he was getting ahead of himself. Considering Lightning's attitude towards him today, he wondered if he would still be breathing tomorrow. Maybe he'd score some points for keeping her from an embarrassing explanation with his one sided rendition, but probably not.

It would be dark soon and when they'd chosen a camp, Hope had dug in his pack to retrieve the remaining rations for dinner. A couple pieces of various fruits and some sort of jerky Fang had made was all that was left. Fang surveyed the food situation and nodded.

"Well, let's get a move on then, it'll be too dark to hunt soon." She waved a hand to Sazh.

"Huh? Me?" He pointed at himself, the chocobo chick in his hair looking quizzically back and forth between the other adventurers.

"Hey, it's ok Sazh. I'll go with Fang." interjected Snow, standing up slowly, dusting himself off. He was pretty stiff as he rolled his shoulders, stretching.

"Uh-uh, Hero. I think you should rest, yeah? Sazh and I can take care of dinner." Fang glanced over at Sazh, arching an eyebrow.

"Yeah. We can handle it." he said on cue, smiling at Snow. "You take it easy."

Snow nodded slightly and sat back down heavily on the ground. He felt like dead weight; he was exhausted, after all. He just hated that it showed. Were his burdens more physical in nature and less mental, he might have dealt better, but here he was with women on the mind at a time like this.

Sazh walked past him, following Fang, and leaned down slightly to whisper something to him. "If I'm not back in an hour, you better come looking for me." He chuckled.

"I heard that!" informed Fang. Snow grinned apologetically at Sazh.

"Oops! Boss lady's calling!" Sazh saluted Snow and ran off waving, trailing the other very dominant female in the group.

Vanille and Hope were busy making a fire and giggling, talking quietly amongst themselves. He sat and watched them a few minutes, a look of amusement and appreciation on his face. At least the kids could have a few minutes of normalcy in this all but normal time. He'd always been of the mind that everything would be fine, but now he just honestly hoped that they'd get out of this alive. Time was of the essence, as according to their brands, but he knew that everyone else shared the same sense of foreboding.

* * *

Lightning had situated herself on the outskirts of the camp behind a thick, ancient tree, honing the blade of her sword. She was tense; she was exhausted, but most of all she was pissed. The slow grinding of the whetstone against her blade was comforting. _This_ she knew about; the hard cold metal between her hands, a sparer of lives or an instrument of death. She knew where to strike to simply disable, as she knew how much pressure to apply to cause grievous injury. She was a natural with the weapon, and a quick study at the academy. She gave up a good portion of her feminity and most of her youth in favour of the service.

As for the more recent developments between her and Snow, she could just kick herself for letting things go as far as they did. Something took over her, made her do things she'd not normally do. It was frustrating to think about the scene; she'd been so powerless. Why had he been out there, anyway? Was he peeping at her? He was sleeping when she left the camp, that stupid dream still taunting her. Why were things happening the way they were? Her feelings were all jumbled up, but she could feel her face barren of emotion in spite of that. She continued to grind at the edge of her sword, concentrating on the fluid motions of her hands. She stopped and stared blankly in her lap for a long moment.

_What is wrong with me?_

Running the stone over her blade obsessively, not paying much attention, she thought about the conversations she'd had with Serah about the big footed brute. Most of them ended in Lightning telling her sister how useless Snow was. For her, his reputation had preceeded him. Sure she'd heard a lot of _good_ things about him, but what did he see in her little sister? Serah wasn't even out of school, and she wanted to run off with Snow and get married? _Tch_. Yeah, over her dead body. She continued the manhandling of her beloved gun blade.

"But we're in love!" Serah had proclaimed; more than once.

_In love, huh?_

All motion stopped. At the words, her mind went blank and she felt Snow's calloused hands on her, tracing over the skin of her neck, arms and finally over her brand. Her palms were slick; the grip on her weapon and whetstone slackened, sliding from her grasp and onto the soft carpet of moss.

_No way. Never. Not him._

But how could she know? She'd never been fond enough of any man to consider one in a romantic fashion, let alone grow to love one. Love had never been part of her plan, not when she was young, and not when she was an adult. She'd never considered it, never wanted it; never needed such things. To love someone else took away your personal power and made you a slave to their mercy. _His _mercy. But she was no one's slave! As if to emphazise the point, she grabbed her blade and brandished it overhead at a nearby tree.

* * *

"Hey, Snow! We're gonna go and get some more firewood, ok?" Vanille said, bounding up to him and bending over to look in his face. Standing a distance behind her, Hope's cheeks reddened when the peppy redhead had bent herself to address Snow evenly. He grinned at the boy, seeing the flush on his cheeks at Vanille's posture. When Hope saw that Snow caught him looking at her he spun on his heel, mouth gaping.

"Yeah, you kids have fun now, hey." He winked teasingly at Hope when his head turned back to scowl at the blonde man.

"We will!" Vanille called back to him as she ran off grabbing the silver headed boy's hand, dragging him along. He thought he heard Hope grumble as he hurried after her. Their chatter droned in the distance and eventually fell silent. Considering the empty camp, he wondered where Miss ex-Guardian Corps went._ She's been gone a while._ He tossed around the idea of wandering after her again, surely this time when he found her she wouldn't be bathing nude in a pool with the moonlight caressing every lovely curve and creating shadows in the hollows of her skin...

He shook his head. Maybe he should just stay in camp. He couldn't seem to keep his thoughts from wandering into intimate territory, not to mention he was good at putting his foot in his mouth when she was around.

His ears perked up when he heard the sound of a tree falling somewhere near by, and a cry of frustration; Lightning's cry of frustration. _How does she have any energy left to swing that sword?_ Scooting down, he leaned into the curve of the tree and closed his eyes; the sand of slumber under his lids.

* * *

"Dinner is served." Came a voice, and a hand on his shoulder.

_Hmmm?_ His eyes peeled open as he looked towards the touch. It was Fang. Bringing balled hands to his eyes, he rubbed them, attempting to banish the sleep that loomed. She pushed a stick of meat towards him, still steaming, smelling quite appetizing. His stomach growled savagely.

"Someone's hungry." Smiled Fang.

"Yeah, I guess." he grinned sheepishly, taking the stick of meat. "Thanks, Fang. It smells awesome."

She nodded at him. "Eat up." She took a bite of her own dinner, looking into the fire as they ate quietly.

He looked around thoughtfully as he ate what she'd given him. He didn't ask what it was anymore, whatever Fang was feeding them tasted more than edible and it kept their strength up to continue on. Everyone was asleep, and he wondered how long he'd been out for. He guessed Fang had taken over what was originally supposed to be his watch.

"I see that one's finally down for the count." Fang nodded towards Lightning's sleeping figure. "Fulla spit and vinegar, she is."

He laughed and nodded in agreement, tearing another piece off the skewer. His slightly crinkled eyes lingered on Lightning; he appreciated the time he could just look at her and she not be aware of it. She slept soundly, though the rise and fall of her chest was barely noticeable on her side her hands folded awkwardly under her head. Feeling revitalized from the nap and food, he stood up easily, tossing the empty skewer into the fire and took off his coat, folding it into a makeshift pillow. Approaching her side, he got down on one knee and softly lifted her heavy head in his capable hand, sliding his coat beneath it. His thumb brushed over her temple before he rested her head his coat. She shifted slightly in her sleep and breathed in sharply, smacking her lips. He froze. _Uh-oh._ She didn't open her eyes, but grasped a handful of the warm coat.

"If there's one thing I've learned in this life," started Fang, breaking the silence, "it's to be thankful for the things you have while you have 'em." He looked back at her, realizing she'd been witness to the tender moment between him Lightning, but she wasn't looking at him. She was looking at the redhead beside her, snoozing. Reaching out a hand to the sleeping girl, she brushed away some rogue strands of hair from her adorable face. "Cause, when they're gone, those memories are all you'll have left."


	5. Chapter 5

"All you have to do is concentrate! Just remember what I told you, and you'll do it! Just gotta practice!" Vanille assured Snow as they walked easily, bringing up the rear of the party.

"Ok!" Snow stopped and closed his eyes, spreading his hands out in front of him against an imaginary target. _Concentrate... you can do it._ He bit his lip and scrunched his eyes together. Vanille watched him, a bemused look on her face. He was concentrating so hard he was forgetting to breathe and his face was turning scarlet. She clamped a hand over her mouth to stifle her giggles. After the long moment, he opened one eye and looked down at his hands. "Did I do it?" he asked Vanille, trying to catch his breath.

"Nope!" she said, sounding perhaps a bit too cheery regarding his failure.

Opening both his eyes now he regarded his hands, flipping them over and back. Sighing heavily, he hung his head. _Damn_.

"It's ok though!" She patted him encouragingly on the shoulder. "You'll get the hang of it. The fal'Cie gave us these powers for a reason, I don't see why we _all_ can't use them..."

He blushed a little, embarrassed at his failure, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. "You're right, Vanille. I'll get it right next time! I'll just concentrate harder!" He flashed his brand and a winning smile at her, his mind made up, his fist balled in determination. He needed to get better at this so he could do it all. Sure he was a good shield, he could take his lumps better than anyone in the group, but he wanted to be more than a pair of fists and a target.

"Yup! Next time!" She nodded and they shuffled along a little quicker to catch back up to the rest of the group.

He looked ahead at his new friends, everyone had stopped; something was up. He hurried to confer with Lightning. Hope was standing close to her side, regarding something white and menacing in the distance.

"Well, those things are all over the place, and they don't look very friendly." Hope started, pointing at the beasts in question pacing back and forth in their destined path across the Palisades to Taejin's Tower. "I think we may have to fight them if we want to get to the tower..."

"I think you're right, Hope." said Lightning simply, drawing her blade. "What do you think, Hero?" she glanced behind her to where she knew Snow stood.

"Let's do it." Snow met the palm of his left hand with the fist of his right, a sure sign he was itching for a fight.

After taking out a few of the creatures and advancing a distance, Snow, Lightning and Hope descended on yet another. Their adversaries turned out to be fast and accurate with their attacks, but they were making some good progress. They could hear the voices of their other three comrades fighting the same foes, but not prevailing as easily.

"HOPE!" shrieked Vanille as she was knocked back against the cliff wall by a well placed paw swipe. Flesh met stone with a sickening thud. Lightning and Snow watched, concerned, as Hope turned to tend to Vanille while the rest of the group continued to fend off their respective opponents.

Snow caught the beast's attention away from the silver haired boy, standing slightly in front of Lightning. It rounded on them again and with a single strike from it's massive paw, it flung them both off the cliff behind and into the treed oblivion below. They fell freely for a few meters and finally met with dirt but were propelled by inertia; and began tumbling down the face of the hill. Lightning clutched desperately for something to hold onto, or to just slow her momentum, but the face was too steep. They could hear each other's muffled exclamations and curses as their bodies bounced and scraped over unforgiving rock and root and trees on the way down.

"Lightning!" Snow's primary concern had been for her and he'd tried to grab hold of her several times when he'd seen her within arms reach, as they helplessly made their way to an eventual end. But before he knew it, he was flat on his face, winded, darkness clouding his eyes as they closed against his will.

* * *

Something felt blissfully cool against her back as she started to come around; her mouth was dry and gritty.

_Ugh, what the hell happened?_

Her mind was hazy as she tried to remember what happened. They'd had a conflict with some local wildlife and during it, she'd gone flying off a cliff, and tumbled down what felt like a mountain. But where was she now? When she managed to open her eyes, she saw light ahead of her, but her vision was tunneled. The point of light seemed to bore a hole through her skull and she squinted against it, a massive headache forcing her eyes closed. A wave of lethargy overwhelmed her and forced her back into slumber.

* * *

When she managed to open her eyes again and rediscovered the tunnel of light before her, she turned her head slowly to the side and saw Snow laying on his chest, his face a couple of feet from hers. It was shadowed, wherever they were, but she could see the blood dried on the corners of his mouth. It hung open and slow laboured breaths wheezed from between his lips. The ground was cool against her cheek, but she couldn't bring her body to move, so she lay there another few moments.

"Snow." she managed to choke his name out. There was no response. "Snow?" Still nothing. She could hear his wisps of breath, but they had a distinctly unhealthy gurgle. "Snow!" the note of panic in her tone surprised her. She needed to get up and check him out, he was in real trouble. Concentrating on her body for a moment, she wiggled her toes and fingers, making sure they were all still there. She moved her stiff arms to her face and probed her temples. She still had a helluva of a headache.

Rolling over onto her elbow and bracing herself with her arm she slowly sat up. Trying to keep her thoughts focused, she crawled on all fours to Snow's side and put her hand on his shoulder, shaking him lightly. "Snow." Without knowing where he was hurt, she couldn't risk moving him, so she put the back of her hand at his mouth to feel his breath. The responding gurgle made her stomach turn, his breathing was shallow and weak. She needed to tend to herself first if she were to even think about healing him. Sitting on her bottom, she probed herself to see if she had any wounds. Her actions were slow and stiff, the headache still threatening to overcome her. She wiggled and moved everything she could, and passed her hands over her body checking for unusual sore spots and blood. Running her hand down her right thigh, she felt something sticky. "Great..." she muttered, and brought her bloodied hand to her eyes to survey it. She squirmed around to look at the outside of her thigh, crusted with dry blood and fresh blood from her probing. She needed something to tie around the wound to put pressure on it. Remembering the black bandana Snow had stashed in his coat pocket, and instead of ripping up her jacket, she gingerly reached into pocket and retrieved the square of cloth. It was probably still stained with his blood, but it was better than nothing. She was exhausted and her mind was too foggy to focus on a healing spell for herself. Besides, her injuries were minor when compared to the half alive blond that laid prone before her. She needed to rest. Clutching the bandana in her shaking hand, she stretched out her leg and wrapped the large piece of cloth around her thigh, tying the ends in a tight knot, wincing as it pressed the wound together.

Finishing her self examination, she turned her attention to Snow again. He was unmoving and seemed utterly lifeless. She didn't know his status and judging from the blood on his lips and the gurgle in his throat, he must have had some internal bleeding. That worried her. A cure spell wouldn't hurt him, in fact just the contrary but she wasn't sure if she could even pull one off in her state. Even then, she might be able to bring him back from the brink she suspected he was on. She closed her eyes and forced her breathing to even out, focusing as best she could on her meditation. Her mind's fog cleared a little bit, the deep breathing doing the trick. _Breathe in..._ Her wound was stinging a little, but it was mostly numb. _Breathe out._ There'd been a lot of blood, maybe it was just superficial. _Breathe in..._ She'd been using the deep breathing technique ever since she had started with the Guardian Corps. _Breathe out._ When she got back home to Cocoon, she vowed to have a real bath, maybe with some of that girly bubble bath Serah insisted on buying her...

After a couple minutes of therapeutic breathing, she opened her eyes and decided to give it a go. Sliding on the gritty ground, she stopped when she was as near as she could come to his side. She decided skin to skin contact would be best to administer the cure spell, it was bound to be inadequate to meet all his needs, so she wanted as little resistance as possible. His jacket was splayed out around him, so she pulled it over his rear and pushed it up, along with his shirt, exposing the small of his back. His back was taut and smooth looking; her eyes appreciated the valley of his spine closed on both sides by statuesque cords of lean muscle all the way up and under his clothing. Breathing in deeply, she wasn't sure if she was ready to touch him again. Touching his skin did something odd to her, but she had no choice. Closing her eyes, recalling nerve and concentration, she gently pressed her damp palms against his back and muttered a word. Her hands glowed faintly against his warm skin and she felt the energy being pulled from her body and absorbed into his. It wasn't much, but she held it as long as she could before her near collapse.

She was breathless when she removed her heated hands from his flesh and replaced his clothing. Her chest heaved with every breath; that spell had taken all she had left. She only hoped it was enough to bring him around. There was still no movement, and she watched him closely, pushing herself away to maintain her comfortable distance. Tension filled moments threatened to drag on for an eternity, and her chest was tight with anxiety. Finally he sputtered awake, his body wracked with coughing fits. He opened his eyes to squint at her.

"Easy." she warned, putting her hand on his forehead, checking his temperature. His forehead was clammy, and he still didn't look right.

"Light..ning. What happened..?" His face was slack and his eyes drooped. His skin was pale, to be sure, but she hoped it was the dull light around them that fashioned his face to emulate death.

"Do you remember flying off the cliff and rolling down the hill?" she asked coolly.

"You mean a bus _didn't_ hit me? It sure feels like it." he grinned slightly. She shook her head. _Always a joker._

"Well, I don't know where we are now, exactly, but..." she looked up at the point of blue sky above "I think we're in a hole. Or an underground cave or something."

"Where's everyone... else?" he asked weakly and tried to push himself up with his arms.

"I don't know."

Watching him struggle to set himself up to lean on the wall nearby, she secretly wanted to help him, but she wasn't sure she could stop touching him again once she had started. Seeing him hurt, like he was at the Estheim's, tugged at her heart strings. His lips had been dry and cracked in her dream, but they weren't dry and cracked when she'd kissed them, swollen and stinging, the other night. _Keep it together, Farron._ He grimaced ever so slightly as he tried to breathe deeply. Her face was it's usual carefully crafted visage.

"You hurt anywhere else?" She asked, her eyes narrowing. She could tell that he did, but at least that sickening gurgle was gone.

"I'm ok." he assured and shifted slightly. He wrapped an arm around his ribs and gritted his teeth again against the rising pain. Focusing on the shadowed bruise his forearm bore, he was reminded of Lightning's spike of anger as she'd slapped his arm away when he dared touch her that night. It was a reminder that he'd made no real amiable progress with her. Since then she'd been cold to him; colder than ever. She'd not made any attempts at conversation; this had been the most she'd addressed him in the past days. Now, she sat across from him, her face completely stoic, eyes closed.

They sat in silence for a while, and his eyes became accustomed to the shadows of their earthy prison. Every short breath was laced with pain. He thought he might have broken, or at least bruised, a rib or two. He'd had the same sensations when he'd dove off the precipice of the building after Hope. He must have reinjured himself. Wanting to pay attention to something other than the pain caused by his injuries, his gaze studied the pink haired soldier before him. A warm tingle in his lower back drew his attention as he looked at her; it was warm and was calming. It felt like someone had laid hands on him recently, but he remembered no one having to do that since Vanille yesterday. There was no mistaking the feeling though. It was one of intimacy, and his eyebrows knitted together for a brief second. _She did it. I must have been in bad shape... _He didn't want to disturb her, so he made a note to thank her later. Stuffing a hand in his pocket, he realized his spare bandana was gone. _Ah, hell, that was my favourite one._ He glanced at her again in the dimness, looking to see if she had it on her person. Indeed she did. It was tied around her thigh, and he could make out blood smeared beneath it. The sight made his heart skip a beat, and he inhaled a little too deeply. Suppressing the shallow coughing fit, he looked upwards to the sky and felt a raindrop land on his forehead; and then another. Clouds had rolled in and blotted out the view of the blue sky, the bright beam of light from above was muted.

She wasn't sure how much time had passed as she rested and meditated. Snow's injuries aggravated him; she could hear his shallow, ragged breathing from a mile away. Her mind had recuperated and she felt very much in control of her faculties. She knew she'd have to touch him again, but she'd be prepared this time. She would be no slave to her more base feelings.

"Take off your shirt." She said simply, breaking the stale silence of the hole in which they found themselves. Opening her eyes, her gaze met his and he raised an eyebrow. "No funny business. I've been meditating to try and regain some strength to give you a decent cure."

"What about your leg?"

"My leg isn't making me breathe like a wounded ogre." she said matter of factly.

"Ah. Point taken." He chuckled and winced again. He tried to shrug his jacket off, but he was limited when it came to pain free movements, so his attempts were futile. "Uh, would you mind...?"

She sighed feigning annoyance, and shuffled on her knees over to him. Her thigh began to protest at the movement, but she doubted she'd be able to stand until it received some healing of it's own. His long legs were spread apart in an easy position, and she shuffled between them, careful not to touch the insides of his thighs, or anything else. She bent forward, grasping the rounded corners of his coat, pulling the jacket off his very broad shoulders and down over his arms, her face tucked into the crook of his neck. She held her breath against the allure of his scent, but she couldn't escape the warmth that radiated from his skin. Pulling back from him, she regained her stiff posture and moved her hands to the zipper of his sleeveless striped shirt.

Rapt, he couldn't take his eyes off her as her hands worked at the zipper. He watched her face as she worked; it was dirt streaked and abrasions marked her usually flawless skin. Her hair was strewn messily over her shoulders; in it were bits of leaves and twigs. Sazh's chocobo chick might have moved in if they were to get back to camp in their present condition. When his shirt finally fell open, she once again bent toward him, her face finding the crook of his neck as she pushed it off his shoulders. He didn't feel her breath on him this time either; she must have been holding it. He might not have smelled very pleasant, but she smelled divine, even after their little trip. He moved his head to the side ever so slightly, hoping she'd not notice. _No funny business._ The delicate scent of her hair intertwined with the overtones of unearthed dirt and sunshine sent his head spinning. He sat painfully still.

When she pulled back again, she noted he wore a black undershirt with a very deep v-neck. This one had to go over his head. Grasping the hem of it she started to pull it up over his chest, and he raised his arms so she could get it over his head, but she couldn't reach while on her knees. Carefully she attempted to stand, favouring her wounded right leg, taking the fabric higher up as she went. She hissed a curse as her leg wobbled and gave out beneath her. Snow, ignorant of his own discomfort, yanked his arms out of the holes and grasped her hips, steadying her. His chest screamed with pain but still he held fast to her hips, shouldering her weight like he had before. She eased herself down, returning to her kneeling position with minimal effort on her part, acutely aware of the deft hands that lingered on her hips.


	6. Chapter 6

_A/N: Thanks for the reviews everybody! Sorry for the cliffhanger at the end of the last chapter! Before I knew it, I had a Behemoth of a chapter and I had to cut it off somewhere! Now without further ado..._

* * *

She moved her hands to his forearms and grasped them, removing his grip from her easily. Breaking the eye contact, she stared down at his left forearm where he'd been healed by Vanille earlier on and realized, with a pang of regret, that _she_ should have been the one to heal him. Not just today, but back _then_; back _there_. She had been too wrapped up in her own selfish self-preservation techniques to see he had been injured during the course of their encounter. The pad of her thumb skimmed over the new skin, and she felt him shudder at the contact. Obviously Vanille hadn't been lying about the area being especially sensitive. She made no attempt at conversing with him, choosing to stay silent, but tension hung thick on the air. She released his arms to his thighs, and pressed her soft palms against his hard midsection. He didn't make a sound at her touch, and she closed her eyes, concentration etched on her face.

Her heart was racing, but she kept her face neutral. Everywhere he came into contact with her was burning, she still felt the pressure of his steadying hands on her hips even though they left under her direction. Muttering a word, her hands glowed, renewed from her quiet meditation.

Snow closed his eyes and felt the warmness seep within him, concentrating mostly in his chest, but soon it soothed his whole body like he was being caressed everywhere at once. He could almost feel the bones knit back together and breathing came more easily to him now, though it possessed a nervous, uneven rhythm.

_Lightning; it can't protect, it only destroys._

Maybe she didn't have to be _Lightning_ anymore. She wanted to protect _him;_ with every fibre of her being, she wanted to be the one he thought of when he was lonely. Being this way with him now seemed right; her mind and thoughts were no longer overcome with the guilt of her undeniable attraction to the betrothed man. She'd discovered a tenderness and a sense of honour that she'd never cared to see in him before. Never wanting to believe these things about him, or that such an honourable, altruistic man could even exist, she'd been insufferable. After all, she'd hit him, unleashed tirades of obscenities, hurled insults about and at him; and shooed him away like an annoying bird pecking at her unripe sister. Never taking the time to talk to him or get to know him, she spat on his do-gooding and defender of the people attitude dismissing it as him trying to cover up for his cockiness and lack of direction. Maybe they always had this strange attraction and that was why she wanted him to be _hers_ instead of her sister's, and in any case, she came to the conclusion that she didn't know her own mind anymore.

Channeling the swell of emotion into her palms, she willingly gave that power to him; to heal him.

He swallowed against the surge of energy, his head tilting back dizzily. Then the intense warmth ceased as Lightning took her hands off his abdomen. He let his head rest against the wall, raindrops gently misting his face. He was flying high, the feel of her energy still within him, but he could hear the exertion in her breathing. They sat quietly in each other's company until he raised his arms above him and stretched, taking a deep breath. He felt even better than before.

"That was some spell." He said looking down at her brightly. She didn't say anything. She'd moved away from him and was leaning on her left side, still favouring her right leg. "Ah! I feel so much better. How's your leg?" He motioned to it.

"It's fine." She said stubbornly. Truth be told, that little healing session took a lot out of her; her leg throbbed and the uneven gash burned. She wasn't about to tell him that though.

"Hey, Vanille's been trying to teach me something. I'm not picking it up very well, I guess my skull's too thick." He laughed rapping on the side of his head, standing up and closing the distance between them. She watched him carefully, wondering what he had up his sleeve. He got down beside her on his knees and reached his hands out to touch the black cloth that encircled her upper thigh. She jerked her leg away from him, like a wounded animal, and gritted her teeth against the stabbing pain. "Hey, it's ok." The masculine timbre of his voice made her skin tingle. "I'm not a pro, but I don't think I can hurt you. Who knows, it might even help. At the very least, you can call me an idiot when it doesn't work." He smiled at her again, but it was a false smile; something about those words stung him.

She suddenly felt awful for putting him down all the time. Serah probably treated him better; been nicer to him, even sweet. She probably treated him like a man instead of a dolt; which was only half of what he deserved. The slight shower of rain persisted, and she swallowed tightly, watching the muscles under his skin move as he reached out to her, the water trickling down his bare frame. She was thoroughly unprepared for him to continue.

He was careful not to touch her skin as he untied the piece of fabric and unwound it from around her thigh. The blood had not yet coagulated between it and her skin, and he was thankful he didn't have to cause her more discomfort by yanking it off. He put the bandana aside and looked at Lightning. "Ready?"

She nodded slowly, watching his every move with great interest.

He fanned out his fingers laying his hands upon her torn silken skin so lightly that it in itself was almost painful; his hands steady as a rock, as he closed his eyes to concentrate, speaking the word after a few prolonged seconds. Watching his face, she could see he was holding his breath.

_Breathe._ She thought at him, her attention fixed on his closed eyes.

He drew a long steady breath and watched as his hands begin to emit the soft green glow associated with the spell; but more than that, she _felt_ it. Her breath caught in her throat as his energy flowed into her wound, melding flesh together; smoothing over it like a lover's sigh. _Amazing..._ Her eyes were fixed upon him as the relentless burning and pain faded from her limb. She felt overwhelmingly tired, but blissfully pain free.

When he felt the energy start to pool at his hands, he pulled them away from her thigh, genuinely surprised at himself. Examining his hands with a triumphant smile he looked over to her excitedly. Her eyes drooped as she wavered about to topple over. Moving quickly, he situated himself behind her, legs stretched out around her as she slumped against him. He couldn't help but chuckle as she rested against him, her head nuzzled in his neck, his chin on her forehead protecting her face from the rain, but mostly just enjoying the contact.

* * *

Lightning had been out like a light for an hour at least, he figured. There was still no sign of help, and he decided that the others simply couldn't find them. Maybe they'd fallen so far that there was too much terrain to search with any type of speed. Either way, nightfall would come to them swiftly and he had to start thinking about some way to get out of the predicament they were in. It wouldn't be easy to start a fire down here, mostly due to the dampness, in spite of the few pieces of wood there with them. On top of that, it was still raining. It'd get real uncomfortable real soon. Supporting her with his arms, he slid out from behind her and propped her up against the dirt wall where he'd sat. He took a second to observe the results of his fledgling healing spell on her thigh. Her skin was still red where he'd laid hands on her, but it looked like the ugly gash had not even existed if not for the bloody mess surrounding it. He touched the remaining proof of her injury with his index finger, wondering if it felt as sensitive as his mended flesh did. He mused when he realized that there was no one else he'd rather be stuck in this hole with. Taking off his coat, he laid it over her frame and tucked it under her chin, brushing a chunk of blushed hair from her face.

Turning his attention to the more pressing matter of escape, he scanned the area for anything useful. He closed a hand around a rock that looked stable enough to use as footing; perhaps they could climb out. The earth holding the rock crumbled as he pulled at it, testing his weight. _No good._ There were various roots and such along the insides of the wall, but nothing looked heavy duty enough to support them. Elevating his gaze, he saw a plant growing out of the wall, not too far out of reach, for him at least. Upon closer examination, he saw a striking silver flower glinting from the centre of the small bush. The flower had five wide, thick petals curling back from a bright yellow stamen. He reached up to pluck it, bringing it to his nose, inhaling the sweet heavy scent. He'd never seen such a flower before, and although he wasn't familiar with flowers, he judged this one a rare beauty. He turned back to his fellow captive, watching her sleeping features for a moment, and nestled the bloom in her tangled hair just above the ear.

She stirred.

"Hey, sleepyhead..." he said softly, his face showing signs of relief.

Lightning opened her eyes, blinking against the drab scenery. "I thought I was dreaming." Her tone was a bit irritated.

"Did you like my new trick?" He beamed.

"_Trick_ , eh? _Tch_." She scowled at him, turning her head away. Did he never take anything seriously? Was everything a game to him; one big joke? Finding his coat laid over her, she pushed it back at him, as if she were disgusted by it. He took it from her, his smile fading into a tight thin line.

"What's your problem?" Snow challenged her, straightening up and putting on his abandoned coat.

"...My _problem_?" She spat back, meeting his challenge.

"Why don't you just say what you want to say?"

"And what exactly is it that am I supposed to want to say?!" She questioned, taking a step towards him. Water dripped down her face, but her eyes were unbothered, staring straight through him. What exactly _did_ he want her to say? She honestly didn't even know why she was getting angry in the first place. He just incited too many emotions in her at once for her to tell them apart.

"That you still blame me for everything! For Serah; that it's all my fault!" He ground out between his teeth.

Her eyes became slits. "You really think I'm still pissed about Serah? And you really think that I still blame you for everything?" She took another step toward.

"Well, don't you? Even after all that's happened, you still can't open up to me and tell me what's wrong." He accused.

"Even after all that's happened..." she whispered tersely, averting her eyes. She was amazed at how dense he could be. She shivered from the anger that welled in her, and from the twist in her stomach from being so close to him. Once again she longed for his hands on her skin, they'd not so much as touched each other since those couple nights ago. She kept her usual distance from him, even though it made it hard for her to breathe. She had awoken this morning with the scent of him in her nostrils. His coat smelled slightly musky, his natural scent was intoxicating as it mingled with the earthy aroma of Gran Pulse. She'd been a little on edge the whole day because of it.

"Just say it, Lightning! Let me have it!" He thumped his chest for emphasis, water flying off his fist.

She backed down, ashamed at her childish behaviour. Even though she felt great need to keep him at arm's length, she didn't need to be mean about it. They were both adults. Dealing with uncomfortable feelings was something that was bound to happen from time to time and even though she was ashamed by those feelings, she didn't _want_ to deny them. She simply didn't have a choice. Being an adult also meant sacrifice. "No."

"No?" That wasn't the response he expected from her. She had something to say, and he would hear it even if he had to force it out of her; he would hear it even at his own expense. He grabbed her wrist, pulling her nearer to him, but kept a healthy arm's length between them.

His hand seared her flesh when he seized her wrist. She snapped her head back to stare him down as lightning flashed overhead and a crack of thunder shook the ground.

"If I say it, I can't take it back!" She roared at him. They stood motionless, rain starting to pour on them from the angry sky above. Her chest heaved, control slipping away. He searched her eyes for meaning and found only his reflection of unsureness in them.

"Say it." He growled, his stomach tightening, seeing the change developing in her. She was pissed, but there was something else. He'd seen her pissed dozens of times; been on the receiving end a few times as well, but this time he didn't know what he was getting into.

Ripping her hand free from his grasp, she threw herself at him, arms outreached with palms flat, shoving his heavy frame violently up against the wall behind him. Sealing her open mouth clumsily to his, she tasted the trace of copper on his tongue left behind from his flirt with death.

"Mmph..." His voice was muffled by her demanding kiss. "Careful. You just fixed me."

Trapping him between her body and the dirt barrier, she opened his shirt for the second time that evening and pressed her fingertips into the taut flesh of his sides, pulling herself ever closer to him.

"Shut up."

She seemed almost possessed as she assaulted him, liquid fire seeping from every pore, and the rain that met her skin could do nothing to cool her. Slipping her hands underneath his damp layers, she eagerly exposed the delicious skin of his shoulder to her probing lips and was rewarded with a throaty murmur. Undressing him like this when her intent was not to heal, but to engage him in a bold exchange of passion, drove her to want more.

Utterly shocked but ultimately pleased by her naked display of aggression, he let her lead him away from thoughts and doubts and regret; meeting every kiss and every caress with one of his own. He unbuckled her white overcoat, sliding his hands underneath the back of her shirt and dragged his fingertips tortuously over the small of her back. Moving a capable hand to grip her hip; the other grasping at the tab of her zippered sweater; he and made quick work of the barrier. He felt her hands grip the length of his hair, pulling him down to her chest, arching her back against him. He obliged, running the flat of his tongue boldly over the sensitive blackness of her cursed mark. Lightning flashed and another roar of thunder drowned out her cry of reckless abandon, but Snow could have been completely deaf and still understand what he was doing to her. He wondered how many bruises he'd have in the morning. She let her arms fall away from his thick hair, her clothing slipping down to the ground.

The rain came down around them harder, making mud of their floor.

She balled his black undershirt in her fists, pulling at it, and he figured he better take it off himself before she ripped it to shreds. Pulling her back into him he tore the fabric from his body, and threaded his hands through her messy pink tresses. The silver flower bobbed in the sea of her hair as his fingers stroked her crown. They were getting soaked; water running down every part of their bodies, and he met her lips in a watery kiss. Her hands explored the smooth plains of his chest as they drank deeply of each other's desire. Over the last couple of days she had denied herself memory of his touch and as though he were made of the deadliest poison, she'd given him wide berth. She had a feeling that she'd always be drawn to him, like now; into his weighty gravity. Through she wasn't sure that she wanted to be anywhere else. Dragging her nails in random patterns over his taut chest, she marveled at it's perfect design.

He had slipped a thumb under each strap of her black brassiere, watching her face for any hesitation. She was tucked into his chest, busily placing kisses all over his heated flesh, and he'd seen no misgivings under his touch. After all, she _had_ been more nude last time. But that was different; she had not been completely herself, even though she halted his escape. He still remembered the sound of his name on her lips. He wanted to make her say it again; a hundred times over, in all different ways. This time though she was herself; they'd been arguing, he still wasn't sure what about, and then something in her boiled over. She had come to him again impressing quite confidently that she wanted to be reminded of their distracting obsession with each other. This time around, he'd more than oblige.

Dipping his head to her pulse, he trailed light kisses up to her earlobe and nudged it with the tip of his tongue. She shivered in his embrace, ceasing her own caresses. Bringing a hand up to pull wet hair from around her neck, he slipped the straps off her shoulders and down to the crooks of her elbows. This limited her movement and she whined against him, no longer able to trail her hands over his chest and arms. Pushing her palms against his abdomen, she stilled; enjoying every touch, every taste he took of her. A grin tugged at the corners of his lips as he slipped his fingers under the clasps of her bra; one easy movement would render her exposed to him. She writhed against the impromptu bonds that stayed her hands.

"Take it off..." she begged, a low rumble of thunder accentuating her demand.

"Ah ah ah. Patience, sergeant."He chided, moving devastatingly slow down her neck, pressing his tongue into the hollow of her throat. She whined again and threw her head back, grinding against him. Drops of rain spattered against her cheeks as she gulped the cool air. "Patience." He told himself, whispering against her. He just wanted to rip the wretched garment off her as she grinded against him, teasing him just as badly as he was her. He continued his intended course down over her collarbone, placing feathery kisses down the centre of her chest. Blowing cool air over her rain-soaked mark, her body trembled against him.

"Please, Snow." She hummed.

He growled, almost ruefully; his fingers manipulating the clasp open. _She has no idea what she does to me_. He didn't think it possible to ever deny her anything; especially if she sang his name like that.

With her hands now free, she flung the black undergarment off and knotted her hands in his hair, pushing his bandana aside. He moved to kiss her again, his free hand skimming across the waist of her skirt, and up the side of her flat belly. She met his kiss eagerly, panting into his mouth as his hand finally palmed one aching breast.

"Oi! You guys down there?!" Came a voice from above - outside of their private world. It was Fang. Lightning tensed and pushed away from Snow, shock and surprise on her face, as if her mom had just caught her stealing from the cookie jar.

Neither one of them could speak, their hearts both pounding wildly. He felt her pulling away from him again, but took her hand in his, desperately lacing their fingers. Only her eyes betrayed the aching loss she now felt with his hand clutched in hers.

"Snow? Lightning? Are you down there?" She called out again.

They only had moments left before they needed to reply or help would move on and they'd be abandoned. Snow cupped Lightning's cheek in his free hand and placed a warm kiss on her lips. Much had happened but with their lips pressed together this way, Lightning felt an undeniable sense of sorrow. Somewhere within her, she knew that this would be the last time she'd kiss him, or be in this way with him ever again. She'd not even been able to tell him what she so desperately wanted for fear that speaking it aloud would forever change the course of their fates; toward the ruin of them both.

He felt helpless against the sadistic hands of time and circumstance. He wanted to remain silent and forever hide from the fate that drew ever closer; the fate that lead him to Serah and away from Lightning. The impossibility of his new feelings were like a weight upon him and before he even knew them, they were over; it was over.

Their lips reluctantly parted, and he raised his head to the tearful sky. "Down here, Fang!"

Snow's hand still clung stubbornly to hers and she gripped it tightly, as if that was all they'd need. She'd been a big sister a long time and helped Serah mend many broken hearts; but Lightning never had hers hurt.

She never believed that simple fact would change.


	7. Chapter 7

Fang had impeccable timing. The walk back to camp was silent as she lead the way through the brush and low hanging foliage, the sky starting to clear. She seemed to be walking a calculated distance ahead of them as Lightning and Snow walked beside each other, their strides equally somber. Clothing was meticulously replaced, visages carefully rearranged and walls re-bricked.

Snow cast a sidelong glance at the now reserved beauty he'd shared intimacies with only a short time ago. Lightning did not hold her head as high as her usual stance dictated; an air of melancholy enveloping her as they moved through the forest. Remembering the feel of her breast in his palm, he reached out and took her hand in his, seeking reassurance and reconnection. His fingers were warm in hers; she'd miss it; miss him.

"This can't go on." she said just loud enough for him to hear.

"I know." he admitted holding onto her hand stubbornly, like a child who wanted something he could not have.

"Forget me." she choked out, the words hoarse. He knew those words were coming; he just didn't know when. It was silly to think that Lightning could have said anything else. '_I need you' _ didn't seem quite her style. Not to mention she wasn't doing this for herself; she did it to ensure her sister got what she deserved. She was a woman of few words, but when she had something to say, she meant it. Maybe if it were another time, or another life; but not this time. Not this life. She released his hand to let it dangle at his side.

They were almost near camp and Fang held out an arm to halt them. Turning around, she glanced understandingly at Snow who always wore his heart on his sleeve, then at Lightning. Lifting a hand to Lightning's face, Fang plucked the flower from her tangled wet hair, and rested the token in the soldier's palm. Momentary anguish flickered on her features as she eyed it, realizing who must have placed it there. She couldn't look at his face, the reality she spoke into existence was too new; the wound too fresh.

"If you two need a minute..." Fang offered, her voice low.

"We don't." interrupted Lightning, walking purposefully toward the firelight, closing her fist around the silver bloom. She could hear the muted conversation of Hope and Vanille as she approached.

Snow's face was painfully conflicted, as if there had been another path to choose but he was unable to traverse it. Catching Fang's discerning eye, Snow offered an empty smile. It was almost painful for him to watch Lightning walk away from him, and he smiled not to feel better, but to keep the darkness at bay. Fang saw through his brave face, and patted him on the shoulder. He nodded.

When Hope saw Lightning revealed in the firelight, his face brightened. "Light!" He unabashedly threw his arms around her middle and hugged her tightly. She smiled lightly at him and stroked his silver hair.

"You two had us worried there! What happened? Are you ok?" questioned Vanille.

Lightning had opened her mouth to reply, but Snow started to explain before she had a chance. He recounted their tale from his perspective, leaving out the more sordid details. Excited to tell Vanille that he had been able to summon a cure spell, he made Lightning's wound out to be graver and deeper and bloodier that it had actually been to suit his story. Lightning nodded, conceding to his colourful re-creation when Vanille would _ooh_ and _aah_ at an exciting bit. Hope was practically glued to his pink haired mentor's side. They touched arms as they sat beside each other before the fire, listening to Snow drone on and on about the afternoon's adventure.

The rain had finally let up, along with the thunderstorm but neither one of them would ever experience a storm the same way again. She found herself staring absently at the only man she'd ever let know her in an intimate way. She felt a little shy about it, but there was no use in thinking on it anymore. It would never progress beyond what it was, nor would it ever happen again. Snow wasn't hers and she'd do well to never forget that.

"Is your leg better now?" asked Hope, his voice dragging her back into the present.

"Yeah." she nodded. Hope looked down at her leg, the redness still visible even by firelight. He leaned forward to inspect Snow's handy-work. She stifled a sharp breath when Hope's fingertip touched the now invisible gash.

"Oh! I'm sorry!" Hope blushed furiously, yanking his hand back as if her thigh were a hot stove.

Snow watched them, wishing he was the boy that held Lightning's open admiration. The admiration was mutual, and it was more than obvious. In a few years if Hope didn't forget about Lightning, he may pursue her romantically. _It wouldn't matter, anyway._ He thought somewhat bitterly. Snow was completely out of the running for Lightning's affections; not that he ever could have been seriously considered a contender due to his current standing. Shaking his head, he once again banished thoughts of himself and Lightning to the back of his head. She was right, it was best to forget her.

The chatter died down after a while and everyone was ready for a good night's rest. Fang volunteered to take watch again, and one by one the companions dropped off to sleep. Lightning found herself again tense and frustrated; needing to wind down a bit more, so she ground the edge of her blade. They had a bit of a jaunt ahead of them to get to Oerba thanks to their little detour, but it could be done if they worked hard tomorrow. _Oerba, then what?_ She'd been so wrapped up in her own feelings that she barely thought about the cataclysmic event that loomed on the horizon. All questions would be answered one way or another, but somehow she seemed to not care as much about her outcome if it didn't involve Snow.

If and when Serah was revived and they were reunited, how would she handle it? She had to make plans now, when she had the luxury of being impartial and marginally less emotional, and stick to them. Lightning would never tell Serah anything about what had transpired between her and Snow, and she knew Snow would keep it under wraps as well. Even if Serah never found out, she didn't feel as though she was good enough anymore. How could she protect Serah when she'd betrayed her in the most unforgivable way? For the first time in a along time she found something other than duty and responsibility in her heart, and she was forced to deny it. Why should such a thing even be possible if all it could do is bring pain?

"Averia." said Fang randomly sitting down by Lightning who was deep in thought.

"Excuse me?" questioned Lightning, raising an eyebrow at the brunette.

"That flower." Fang motioned to the leg pack where she'd seen Lightning tuck the bloom away. "It's an Averia. The plants themselves can live in the harshest conditions all 'round, but they only bloom a couple days outta the year. If you're not lookin' for 'em, you'll miss 'em. And it's a good omen to find one."

"That so." muttered Lightning, seemingly uninterested.

"Yeah. Just thought you'd be interested to know."

_Averia._

_

* * *

_

Gran Pulse really was a beautiful place in spite of all that the fal'Cie had filled their heads with. Standing on the precipice of some long forgotten canyon, Snow stared wistfully into the blue jewel he kept near his heart. He carried her with him where ever he went, and even so, he felt detached from her. He guessed that feeling was normal. After all, Serah wasn't where he could reach her. Things had been so clear back then, before this whole mess. He smiled, remembering Serah's pretty face. The warmness in his chest reminded him that maybe she wasn't as far away as he thought; maybe things could go back to normal. Foolishly and quite selfishly, he thought that maybe his heart had room for both Serah and Lightning. She'd occupied a small space before, so why couldn't it go back to how it was?

Did he want things to go back to normal – back to what they used to be? He wasn't sure anymore. He had blindly charged in as the white knight to save his fair lady, and been used as a pawn; always thinking he was moving of his own volition, but ever propelled to a destructive fate by an unseen hand. The only thing he had managed to do of his own accord was potentially mess up the only good thing in his life; Serah. Things had gotten out of hand due to emotions and a nagging sense of hopelessness. No one ever wanted to feel as though they'd been robbed of their free will, and that incited an emotional revolt in them all. They'd been given reason to fight; to keep going, but he had his reason since the very beginning; in fact, since before the beginning. What happened to Serah wasn't right; it wasn't just; and it wasn't fair. She didn't do anything to deserve the attention of the fal'Cie. After he found out Serah had been marked, things had begun moving down an inevitable path. She tried to push him away, and that only served to prove that his love and support was needed; and although that may have been true, he wondered if he was swept away by his overzealous romantic side during a time in which he'd been spurred into action. Would the damsel in distress still be as significant to him after his task was complete?

He had planned to marry Serah immediately upon their return to Cocoon, but now that future didn't hold the same sparkle as it once did.

"How's Serah?" asked Lightning, coming to stand beside the rugged blond, keeping her distance.

"Same as we left her." Snow said simply, staring ahead at the cloudless sky. Their fractured home sat clearly against the blue background; job unfinished by the l'Cie before them. That is why they were there. That is why they were l'Cie on a collision course with fate. They'd been thrust into a war that was not their own only a short time ago, but it felt like they'd been at it forever. "It feels so far away now."

Turning to Lightning, he offered her the crystalline shard. "Serah says she wants to talk."

Taking it, Lightning spied Cocoon in it's cool, clear facets. She paused a moment, then drawing her weapon, she turned on Snow and swung it wide forcing him to step back. He stumbled rather ungracefully, falling on his rear end. "Once we're home, what's your plan? You're getting married, right?" She held the point at his throat.

"Lightning?" he blinked in shock.

"Serah wants to know." She withdrew her weapon from his face and sheathed it. _Serah and I both want to know._ Looking back over the expanse of wilderness, she sighed.

"Don't scare me like that." He said standing up and dusting himself off.

"You are getting married, aren't you?" Lightning gripped the tear shaped stone in her hand. She didn't want to continue this line of conversation, but she knew it was necessary to reinforce their new boundaries. _Forget me. _She had said to him. Lightning didn't want to be a source of resentment and hate for Serah, so she'd acknowledged the need to put an end to their feelings. It needed to be that way; they needed to make the sacrifice; be the adults. "Don't you let her down, you hear me?" She tossed the crystal tear high in the air, glittering in the bright sunlight.

He caught it easily and displayed it to Lightning. "Don't worry, this tear will be her last. I'll make sure of that." Snow played by her rules. He understood how much it meant to her to not disappoint Serah, so he agreed to put a lid on things as they were between them. It made sense what she had said, even if he hadn't wanted to snuff out their spark. After all, he _did_ love Serah. He thought he could be happy with her, eventually. Lightning had gotten under his skin though, and it was very hard to even think about giving her up.

Lightning nodded. "That's all I need to know." When she had her mind made up, it was made up. So, unless he wanted both Farron sisters to hate him, he best stick to the rules and stay with the one he was blessed enough to have. If he hurt Serah, Lightning would never forgive him and he couldn't risk that. Even still, this charade felt forced and unnatural.

_If there's one thing I've learned in this life, it's to be thankful for the things you have while you have 'em. Cause, when they're gone, those memories are all you'll have left. _Fang had told him. He wondered if the memories he accumulated in the last few days were enough to keep him for a lifetime. He had been thankful for every interaction, every brush of skin, every kiss between them.

Lightning had walked past him to leave the field, and his heart felt as if it were in a vice. He didn't want her to leave yet, he wasn't ready to let it go; to let her go.

"We _will_ see her, right?" he said awkwardly.

He felt her knuckles meet the middle of his back.

"Don't go there. No room for doubt." There was no room for doubt in her mind. This _was_ the right thing for all three of them. She missed her sister and longed to be reunited with her, but she'd done something she couldn't take back. She didn't even deserve to be called 'sister' anymore; she was a fox in the hen house. It was Snow's job to protect Serah now and in order for him to do that, he needed to have a singular goal; to make Serah happy.

"Stay strong." said Lighting softly from Snow's shadow. A tear escaped her eye. She wanted to feel his arms around her again, his sweet breath in her hair. She felt that gentle gravity of his start to pull her in as she took a step to close the gap between them. Their auras mingled; their bodies a hair apart, but they would never _touch_ each other again.

"Don't worry. We'll finish this and go see her together."


	8. Chapter 8

_A/N: Well, I believe we are nearing the end of Hero's Charge. There's another chapter - maybe two left. I do have plans to write a sequel or two to Hero's Charge. I have different ideas, but they can't exist in the same plot line, so they'll have to be seperate. We shall see how that turns out._

* * *

The journey to Oerba had been taxing. Taijin's Tower had been chalk full of strong nasties, and when they'd reached the top, a fal'Cie had stood in their way. They'd taken care of the weakened fal'Cie, and continued on their way; almost mechanically. Vanille and Fang's home wasn't what they had expected, the whole place lay covered in some sort of crystal dust. There were no people around; Oerba stood as a ghost town. Not only was there a lack of civilization, but there had been a lack of immediate solution to their problem. Lightning didn't think that they'd know a solution even if they saw it out here, so everyone was solemn, even Vanille and Fang. It'd been two hundred years since they'd last seen Oerba, but there was no joy in their homecoming. They decided to take refuge for the night; as darkness had been creeping up on them for some time. They'd get a start on exploring the ruinous town in the morning.

Fang and Vanille had explained that Oerba had been a village with everyone living together communally; like a great big extended family. Lightning wasn't crazy about the idea. She was a big fan of her private space and her own bathroom. Hope hadn't left her side much since she returned from the fall off the cliffs at the Palisades. When he would lose sight of her, he'd start to almost panic; and so he would keep himself in her path. She appreciated the concern he showed her, knowing that she was really the only one he wanted to situate himself around, except for Vanille. The redhead was very fond of Hope. So much so she'd touch him whenever she had an excuse to, and kept his attention whenever it wasn't on Lightning. Maybe Vanille just wanted to keep his mind off serious things because he was just a kid, but it wasn't necessary. Hope would have to grow up sometime. Lightning didn't coddle him; she'd never want that if she were Hope, but he was so near to her all the time that she was aware of what his footsteps sounded like, and remembered how feathery fine his hair was. He was so young to grow up so fast. It wasn`t fair that he never had a choice in this. In fact, it wasn`t fair that all of them didn`t have a choice, but Lightning felt particularly compassionate when it came to Hope. She chose to give up her youth but Hope`s was stolen from him.

Snow kept his distance from her, and only really addressed her when the need arose. She was silently thankful that he wasn`t making things harder than they needed to be. She half expected him to abandon rational thought and attempt to reignite their improper relations; that was something his heedless self would do. If she was being honest with herself, she half _wanted_ him to. What an awful sister she was; secretly eager for him to cross that line again. Obviously she didn`t mean more to Snow than just an impetuous hormone-induced state of desperate need. He was obviously thinking about Serah now and what she deserved. She`d already established in her mind that she was thoroughly unsuitable to be Serah`s sister, but she shouldn`t let her thoughts stray anymore. Thinking such things only served to sully her memory and Lightning rebuked herself.

It was Lightning`s turn to keep watch for the night. She was left alone with her thoughts early this evening; everyone was too tired for idle chatter and had fallen asleep already.

Hope`s behaviour of late was beginning to concern her. He was becoming quite attached. Lightning had been thinking of what she was going to do after Snow and Serah were reunited. She was unsure what the world as a whole would look like, considering they hadn`t found a resolution to their l`Cie problem. Hope had his father to go back to, but he'd been damaged in a way no kid should be; but in a way that was all too common in these last violent days. She was sure that there were more orphans today than there had been yesterday, and the day before that. It would have been terrible for Hope to lose his friends too, but there really only was one thing she _could_ do.

"Light?" a little voice interrupted from behind her. She twisted around to see the boy standing in the doorway of the antiquated shack they'd used as their makeshift home for the night. He was without his bright orange and yellow coat, and had on no socks or shoes. She smiled slightly at him. Even though they were on the edge of something that would change their lives, he was still a kid. She'd seen the same look on his face that had been on Serah's quite a few times. When things were troubling her, she'd come to Lightning's room and asked if she could 'hang out' because she couldn't sleep.

"Come sit down with me, Hope." She patted the hard metal step beside her, turning back to look out at the inky darkness. He did as she asked of him and they sat comfortably beside each other until Lightning spoke. "What do you think you'll do once you get back home?"

"Uh. Go back to school, I guess. That's what I would be doing now if..." he looked down at his hands, trailing off.

She nodded. She realized how little she actually knew of the silver haired boy beside her. What was his favourite subject or his favourite book? What kind of music did he like? What did he like to do after school? He must have been like any other kid out there, but she didn't think to talk to him about normal things. She'd remedy that when they got out of this mess. He'd become quite dear to her, if she was being honest with herself. She saw some of herself in him, but she considered him more of a protégé than a little brother. He had a lot of growing up to do, but one day he'd make a fine man. He was clever and even if he didn't think he was strong, he was.

"What about you?" He asked quietly.

She was silent for a long while, and Hope thought maybe she didn't hear him. He opened his mouth to readdress her, but she finally spoke. "I haven't given it much thought." She lied. She had thought about it; at length in fact.

"Oh." He fidgeted; hands in his lap.

Again, silence. Then they spoke each other's name aloud at once, Hope blushing. "Sorry. Go ahead."

"I need to ask a favour." Lightning turned towards him, to look him in the face, her expression very serious.

He looked up at her, his face a bit apprehensive. "A-a-anything..." he stammered, meeting her gaze meekly.

"If something happens... to me. I need you to watch over Serah." Lightning took his hands. They were trembling. "I trust you, Hope." He may have been a kid, but he was developing the heart of a man beyond his years. Serah was not his burden to bear, and Snow was too stubborn to die, but Lightning had to show Hope what he meant to her; in a way he could understand. She had gone through all this with one goal; to save Serah. Hope knew what she meant to Lightning, so to entrust this task to him would show him how she felt.

Opening his mouth to object, Hope looked at Lightning almost desperately. She saw him falter and lightly squeezed his hands. He finally nodded. "Okay."

She put her arm around his shoulder and pulled him close. "Did you have something you wanted to say, Hope?" She said, remembering he had started when she had.

"Nope. Nothing." He said, resting his head on her shoulder.

* * *

The ancient town had been overrun with aberrations, and the going was slow. They'd wanted to search everywhere to see if Vanille or Fang's memories could be jogged and if anything might come up that could be useful. They really had no idea what to expect or what to look for in Oerba.

They stumbled into what seemed to be a schoolhouse; there were desks haphazardly moved around the room with papers on them. At one end there was a chalkboard, and the other wall supported a dusty clock. They figured it had been a long time since the hands last moved. The fine crystal dust covered everything. In spite of the somewhat abandoned state that it was in, Vanille had gotten very excited, and pulled Hope and Lightning along with her to reminisce about some of the familiar items in the room. The chocobo chick chirped excitedly and flew off to introduce himself to a stuffed chocobo toy on the desk at the head of the classroom; Sazh followed laughing.

Snow poked around the room and found some stairs. "I'm gonna go check out upstairs." Once up the long flight of time eroded metal, he found himself on the roof of the old building. It looked like there had been an explosion of nature.

"Whoa..." breathed Snow, stunned at the odd little garden. Bright blooms sprung up from everywhere, pinks and reds; oranges and purples and yellows. And green. So much green. Even butterflies fluttered, flirting with the long stemmed flowers. Oerba itself had been barren, and yet here was this little roof teeming with life. The crystal sands had bombarded it, but it withstood the ravages of time. A set of rocking chairs were on the far side, one tipped over, the other upright; both abandoned. Jagged glass adorned the broken out windows in the tented roof at his feet. He could hear the chattering voices of his companions below. Lightning's resonant voice hung on the air as she asked Vanille a question about her time on Pulse.

With the sound of her voice fresh in his ear, he walked over to the far side of the roof and stared into the near dry fountain. Blossoms adorned the surface of the water, and lily pads too. It was amazing a place like this still existed here. It was kind of a miracle. Reaching in his pants pocket, he pulled out a gil and regarded it for a second. _If this place is a miracle, then maybe it will grant my wish._ Closing his eyes, he tossed the coin into the standing water.

"What did you wish for?" asked Fang, stopping to stand a few feet behind him.

He smiled sadly to himself. "If I tell you, my wish won't come true."

"That's what they say." she noted, coming to stand beside the heavyweight falling silent for a moment. "So you two are just going to pretend nothing ever happened?"

"What do you mean?" asked Snow carefully, not looking at the obviously informed woman.

"Don't insult my intelligence. There's a reason I left everyone at camp and went to look for you alone. I figured you wanted to keep things quiet, considering the _sensitive_ nature of your relationship."

"Oh." Was all Snow could come up with, and remained silent, staring at a bloom that jutted out of the water swaying gently with the crystal sand. "Well, I love Serah, and I have every intention of making her happy." Snow finally said, sounding rehearsed.

"Yeah, I got that bit." Fang said wearily. "You sound like a broken record. I mean, rescuing Serah is very noble and all, but are you sure that you're the man to make her happy?"

The makeshift fence in front of Snow was unfortunate enough to be near his hands when Fang had started to speak. It cracked and groaned in his clenched fists. He knew Serah loved him, and they were so happy together all the time that he had never even considered not being the one for her. "Yes, I am." He looked at his clenched hands. There had never been doubt in the past, but now doubt plagued him. _I _want _to make her happy._

Fang scoffed. "Maybe you should let Serah decide that, yeah?"

Snow looked at her blankly, obviously confused. Her face softened and she punched him in the arm playfully. "Sorry to get all serious on you. Gimme one of those coins." He tried to process what she had just said, and scratched his head reaching into his pocket and pulled out another gil, passing it to her.

Vanille erupted into laughter beneath them. Fang smiled at the spirited sound; set the coin on her thumb and finger and flicked it into the captive puddle. It rotated in the air, catching the light of day, and landed with a muted _kerplunk._

"What did _you_ wish for?" inquired Snow, raising an eyebrow.

"The same thing I always wish for." Fang scanned the horizon of her hometown thoughtfully. "For Vanille to be happy."

* * *

"Well, there's not much Oerba left." said Vanille, disappointment creeping into her voice. "If there's something to find here, we better find it soon."

"Serah?" Gasped Snow, unbelieving of image of his fiancee before him. His legs felt weak, and he wavered slightly.

Everyone turned to him as he breathed her name, and there she was walking towards them. Exactly how they remembered her.

"Where did you -?" She closed the distance quickly and embraced him; the remainder of his question caught in his throat. Her petite frame felt so real as his arms reciprocated the embrace. She felt like Serah; she smelled like Serah. But Serah wasn't alive; not actively anyway. _How can this be? This has to be a trick. _Even so, he closed his eyes; she felt warm against him, and for a second he didn't want to let her go. She wasn't as tall as Lightning, and she was much more delicate against his body. He was rigid against her, almost like he had forgotten how to hold her. It hadn't been that long since she'd been in his arms, but when one has been shown a new way of doing things, one sometimes forgets the old way. He didn't have to be as gentle with Lightning; although he had been. Her flesh was more substantial under his appreciative touches, and he didn't feel like he needed to hold back with her. He looked down at the top of Serah's head; pink hair shining under the sunlight. The same colour as _hers._ He threaded his hand through the tresses, feeling a heat grow in his belly, as his grip on her became less suitable for the younger Farron sister. She had started to talk, but Snow didn't hear a word.

Lightning could see her sister's thin arms wrap around the strapping young man's waist as she pressed her head into his chest. Snow had his hand in her hair, holding her tightly against him. Her heart hemorrhaged guilt and envy and for a second and the perfect mask faltered. She curled her fingers into fists and set her jaw tightly; lips a thin line. Fang glanced over at Lightning, witnessing the reaction.

"While I was sleeping, I kept trying to think of a way to save Cocoon. Together." Just then Lightning saw her sister's eyes flicker; something, or some_one_ sinister drove her. She extended a hand to Snow. Something was off.

As if he'd been shocked, Snow's eyes widened. The figure in his embrace turned cold and unfamiliar. _This isn't her!_ Putting his hands on her shoulders he shoved her away from him, the fire in his belly still smouldering. He watched as she stumbled backwards. He blinked back the illusion he had created for himself; the illusion of the woman he _wanted_ in his arms.

The figure regained her footing and slowly turned to them, clasping her hands together as if to beg. Her facial features were inappropriately cold. "Destroy Orphan. We'll save the world!"

Lightning's heart hardened against the form that stood before them. This wasn't Serah, she was sure of it. Serah wanted to save Cocoon, but destroying Orphan would surely destroy Cocoon. What was going on? "Stop it!" demanded Lightning.

"You can't do that. You love me too much, don't you _Claire_?" Serah taunted, an evil glint in her eye.

"Enough already! We want the same thing!" Snow came in between the two sisters, hand held out to create a line between them. Serah's form glowed unnaturally and Snow moved in front of Lightning, his back to the strange sibling, the light blinding now.

"Barthandelus!" shouted Sazh as the light faded, leaving behind no trace of beloved sister and fiancee; replaced with the visage of the old man they'd come to realize was pulling their strings.

They faced him, and he addressed them as the puppets they were. He spoke of the inevitable destruction of Cocoon; the Maker and his return at the price of the blood of it's people. He even spoke of the restoration of the world. Snow and Lightning's faces were determined while their path was revealed before them; the path they would tread, shackled, leading to their destinies.

She didn't know then that he would make the biggest sacrifice of them all.


	9. The beginning of the end

_A/N: So, this will be the concluding chapter to Hero's Charge. The continuation of this story will begin May 1st in a new story. I don't have a title for it yet though. Please keep an eye out for it, and thank you for your suggestions, kind words and reviews of Hero's Charge. :) Please enjoy this; the beginning of the end._

* * *

Cocoon's pretence as built by the fal'Cie was still in place when they arrived. The people were on edge, but still felt safe; oblivious to the danger that lurked within. Lightning wondered how long the fragile lie would last. They had made a bit of an entrance when they'd returned, but there was no time to dilly dally around. They had to get to Orphan, and fast.

Coming to a dangerous and very high dead end, there was really only one way to go; down. Lightning had had the foresight to take some anti-grav devices off the members of PSICOM they'd defeated as they made their way into the heart of the city. Handing them out to the very confused group of adventurers, she gave the briefest of explanations. "Don't drop them." With that she threw herself off the edge of the platform, leaving everyone gaping.

"See you at the bottom!" Snow winked at the rest of the group as he leapt off the edge following the gutsy woman. He could see her below him, her hair and clothes whipping in the wind as they hurdled towards the ground. Every time he looked at her lately, he felt desperate, almost embarrassingly so. Logical thought slowed, breathing increased; impetuousness threatened. She so enthralled him that he barely recognized himself when he was around her. And to be near to her as he had been in those two amazing encounters left him aching and beaten. She devastated his will and all he wanted was to scoop her up in his arms and ravish her; something he seriously considered doing before Fang had unceremoniously stumbled upon them.

Everyone made a safe landing with the exception of Vanille, who plummeted backside first, shrieking all the way down. Electricity sparked as the anti-grav unit came to life in proximity to the ground, setting the redhead down gently. Fang laughed at her bloodless face and wide, unblinking eyes. She looked completely traumatized.

"That's how they travel on Cocoon!" shrugged Fang nonchalantly. Vanille shook her head incredulously, climbing unsteadily back to her feet.

The streets were littered with overturned vehicles and equipment. Gran Pulse monsters and PSICOM soldiers alike were locked in epic battles for survival.

"All these must be courtesy of the Arks." informed Fang, waving a hand at all the monsters that were on the loose creating mayhem wherever they went.

"They could have just sent a nice fruit basket." sighed Sazh, rubbing his temples. Snow chuckled.

They had split into two groups to take aggressors from both sides; hopefully saving some time as they made their way to Edenhall.

Lightning was in full soldier mode, and Snow watched her from the corner of his eye as she fought, bringing sword down over and over again to the ruin of monster and PSICOM alike. She was lithe and quick, her form perfect. He was all power, and little finesse, but that didn't seem to do him a disservice. He could stand against the toughest of adversaries and survive. Especially with a little help from Hope or Lightning to heal his wounds. They made a very effective team, each understanding what the others needed with merely a word or a glance. They were his companions; the people who he entrusted his life to and would give his life for without hesitation. He wasn't the only Hero; all of them were in their own right.

They progressed quickly through the city ever pursuing their goal.

* * *

Battered and exhausted, they fought against Cie'th, animal, abomination, machine, and immortal; never-ending. They knew the struggle for Cocoon would be over eventually, in one way or another; for better or for worse. All they could do was push through and see it to the bitter end. Finally they entered a great hall from which there was no exit. Looking at each other, they guessed this was where the final battle for Cocoon would take place. Lightning and Snow were the first to step forward to face whatever awaited them. She saw his movement and looked over to him, nodding.

In the middle of the room Barthandalus sat before them, again taunting and tugging at their strings, manipulating them to the end.

"Ah. My errant l'Cie. Won't you at least slay Orphan and make it quick? As an act of mercy?" he petitioned.

"Mercy? You mean murder. And Cocoon won't die. We're not here for that." said Lightning, drawing her weapon and brandishing it in his direction. "We came for you."

"Refusing me but condemns another to face your focus tomorrow. If you truly seek salvation, you will obey." stated the robed man. He made perfect sense, but no one wanted to admit that. If they just did what was bid of them, they may yet still live to see another day. Or, they may not. One thing was for sure, disobedience was the one thing they all craved. The will to do what they thought was right, the ability to take their lives in their own hands. They weren't sure what was right and what was wrong in this case, but they had to make a choice either way and the old man wasn't going to make it easy for them.

The three companions prepared themselves for the battle of their, and everyone else's, lives. Lightning looked at Hope, her face calm; eyes fearless. He nodded at her solemnly, his knuckles white from gripping his boomerang. _Be brave. _She glanced over her other shoulder at Snow. His jaw was locked; resolute. Would the outcome of this battle against these determined foes see their focuses fulfilled or failed? Would she see Snow become the monster in her dream, forever cursed to roam the land as an expendable former human being? Or would she simply see him again, in the flesh, breathing and alive when he awoke from his crystal reward? His confident air put her heart at ease and for a second it didn't matter what happened. They were fighting for a future side by side, and if this was to be her last day alive she could be in no better company. "You ready, Hero?"

Snow grinned disarmingly at her. "Always."

In the end, they had no choice but to do as the old man bid them. Slay Orphan. What happened next surely wasn't up to them. They had a role to fulfill; for every job there was always a perfect tool, Jill Nabaat had said. Now they would demonstrate just how perfect they were for the job at hand.

The ancient fal'Cie had proven to be an easy first match. Same bag of tricks as the last time they'd come up against him; just a warm up for Lightning and Snow. Hope continued to show signs of fatigue but he pressed on bravely. Just as she knew he would.

Wanting to at least inflict some anguish upon the puppet l'Cie, Barthandelus amalgamated himself with Orphan to wield the other fal'Cie's power, and he was all but lost. Thus he was no longer Barthandelus, he was only but a will; a desire to be cut down so that they all may serve as a sacrifice for the Maker. Hope's condition quickly deteriorated. He was visibly exhausted now, bracing himself, his hands on knees and out of breath. Snow and Lightning put their all into the battle, the sound of steel on steel rang out as Lightning's attacks pierced and chipped away at the monstrosity. Snow's swift and powerful punches made the figure groan under the pressure, and the battle raged on. Hope persevered against the ravages of extreme exertion; countering the enemies devastatingly powerful and dangerous physical attacks with the soft warmness of renewal for his comrades. The pace was grueling and the fal'Cie took the opportunity to strike against the boy when he was forced to take a knee as he wheezed, clutching his chest. Lightning had been up in Orphan's vital point striking at it with deadly precision when she saw it's massive hand reach down to strike. "Snow!! Cover Hope!" she shouted.

"On it!" Snow was already sprinting to place himself in the path of the massive clawed hand. Hope's face was slack; his feet frozen to the ground. Jumping in front of Hope, Snow swung his arms around in front to brace himself, but he didn't have time to complete his fleshy shield against the swipe. The claws cut into his flesh as if it were butter and the impact it sent him flying backward, his blood splattered high into the air. Lightning witnessed the events in slow motion. She heard his voice crack; saw his blood, and heard his body meet the cool marble floor with a sickening thud. He`d been clutching Serah`s tear in his hand, and as he hit the ground it came loose from his grip, clinking it's way to a stop just out of his reach.

He had been tossed like a rag doll; his vision was distorted, and there was some ringing in his ears but his body felt warm through an unusual lack of pain. He saw Lightning land stably on the ground, mouth gaping, as she looked at him. He couldn't keep his eyes off her. She struck like her namesake, and he was in awe of how she could be so powerful yet so light on her feet. He recalled the tones of her voice when she had said his name; how it rolled off her tongue the same way no matter if she was going to hit him or kiss him. He marveled at how her lips tasted and how her skin felt against his. He had wanted only to protect her as his fiancee's beloved sister, but now as his lifeblood drained out of him, he longed to be back with her at the waterfall where she'd been so fragile and uninhibited; where she'd _needed_ him. He wanted nothing more than to be able to love her. But now he supposed that to be impossible. _Claire..._ he thought, her form still in his eyes._ That doesn't suit you at _all. A weight crushed his lungs forcing him to exhale, pressure building in his chest, as lethargy washed over him bidding heavy eyelids to close against the light, enveloping him in perfect darkness.

Lightning's face drained of all colour and she halted her attack, to stand and stare at his body, not wanting to accept the sight before her. In all the years she spent as a soldier she saw death many times. She'd even brought it on occasion, but she had never _felt_ the icy grip of death until it came for the one person that meant the most to her in the world. The only person that she ever wanted to rely on; the one person that she could never have for herself, now the one she would have given her own life for to see his restored.

Rage bubbled in her throat as her voice rung out in the hall, a fierce and pained war cry. Dashing towards the aggressor, she launched herself into the air to deal the deathblow. She screamed vengefully as she drove her blade deep into the merciless fal'Cie. Withdrawing her weapon slowly from the body of the hated foe, she landed on the ground, knee bent to absorb the impact. The blade clattered noisily to the marble and she did not dare look up; tears stinging her eyes. _No. Please, no._ Orphan groaned in defeat behind her as she took to her feet, running clumsily to Snow's side and kneeling beside him, heaving his hefty torso into her arms. He had blood on his face, and his head lolled lifelessly to the side. She ripped open his tattered layers, and placed a very unsteady hand over his shredded torso. There was so much blood; his skin already cool to the touch. She didn't want to look away from him to close her eyes and concentrate but energy failed to pool at her hands at will alone. She gasped helplessly, looking at Snow's face, devoid the blush of life.

"Hope! Help me!" she pleaded almost frantically, looking over to the boy. Vanille clutched Fang's hand and Sazh openly gawked as all breathing stopped while the unthinkable scene relentlessly progressed.

Hope snapped out of the daze he was in and stumbled to the other side of Snow's body. Sinking to his knees, he closed his eyes and concentrated all his remaining energy into the spell, his small hands replacing Lightning's on the crimson stained skin. Lightning slapped his cheeks attempting to elicit any response. _You can't leave now. We need you. Serah needs you. _I _need you._

Vanille's eyes welled with tears, and Fang put a hand around her shoulder pulling her into a comforting embrace. Another, almost completely defenseless, form of Orphan had rose quietly from the pool behind them. Awaiting it's fate, it remained there, unmoving, unfeeling, weary of life. Fang felt useless being able to only bear witness to the tragic scene, but now it was time to take action of her own. "Let's go take care of this focus of ours, yeah?" She looked at Sazh. His face was twisted in grief. "Sazh?" He blinked, a tear escaping his eye.

"Yeah, I'm ready. Let's do it." he said, pulling out his pistols. "For Snow." His lips were pursed into a determined line.

"For Snow!" The three agreed aloud, drawing weapons and descending upon the final assault.

"Snow, stay with me." Lightning was completely unaware of what was happening behind her, still slapping his face to bring him around. He was completely unresponsive and she saw the whites of his eyes as his heavy head tipped back against her arm. She slapped him again, frustrated. "Damn it! Don't you do that, Villiers!"

"Light... It's not working. His body... I - I don't know why. Maybe he's already..." Hope's voice was strained, as his eyes overflowed with tears. He sat back on his bottom, his face red from repeated attempts at revitalizing the blond.

The escaped azure jewel refracted the light in the room, catching her eye. Reaching a hand out toward it, she picked it up. With the cool stone clutched in her hand she looked down into Snow's handsome face, hot tears spilling onto his ashen cheeks. She touched his brand, white and useless looking now, her fingers smearing his blood across it. They'd done it; they'd fulfilled their cruel, rigid fates, standing on the edge of a new world, and she felt utterly lost knowing she was to face it without him. Taking his gloved hand in hers, she placed his love's tear in his lifeless palm closing fingers around it, cradling his limp body in her arms. Pressing his blood soaked chest to hers she wept openly against his shoulder. How could he leave now when they had done the impossible; they had survived. He stood against incredible odds; protecting the ones that he loved. He lived every day of his life like that, and so it was only appropriate that was how his life ended. But was this the price the two were destined to pay for their clandestine affair? Her tortured sobs echoed throughout the great hall, shattering the eerie stillness.

A strange sensation started in her feet, interrupting the torrents of despair. Numbness traveled up her body and as she looked down at herself, she was horrified to see herself crystallizing as Serah had. She gasped looking at Hope who had already changed from flesh into his crystal prison, the crestfallen expression chiseled forever on his young features. Sazh had taken his place standing behind her after the fall of the almost child-like fal'Cie, now trapped in his shimmering reward. But Vanille and Fang were no where to be found, and when she looked back at Snow, his transition was almost complete; face frozen in the semblance of death.

And then there was nothing.


End file.
